Finding The Courage

Part 59

I turned to make my way back to the hotel that was now our home. As I walked I felt the eyes of everyone on me as I moved. I picked up my pace until I was almost in a light jog through the compound. I was so determined to get away from the eyes around me that I didn't notice Four right in front of me.

"Whoa whoa." Four grabbed my shoulders to steady me. "What's wrong, why are you running?"

"I can feel them watching our every move. I hate it." I whined as I looked up at Four. Four ran a hand over my hair in an attempt to sooth me. Before he could say anything else we heard footsteps.

"Tris." Four said, his brow forward with worry. "Are you all right?" He dropped one of his hands from my shoulder. Tris didn't even seem to register me as she shook her head and pushed him away from me up against the wall and began to kiss him. He struggled against her at first but as I disappeared behind the door to our room and slid down the wall on the other side I guess he stopped caring. The fire that had started bubbling inside of me came back to life again. Tris was not a leader, she was a selfish girl who did not care about anyone outside of her and Four. Four who let her get away with things he never would have been okay with if it was anyone else. I slammed my fists against the floor. I had been so blinded by my desire to be a good friend and keep her alive I had ignored how reckless and selfish she truly was. A whistle outside the room brought me out of my anger and I felt it sizzle just a little.

"Shut up." I heard Tris shout and I jumped up to move to my bed in an attempt to pretend everything was okay. Uriah and Christina entered the dorm room followed by Four and Tris a few moments later as if they had not been making out just outside the door. Four tried to catch my eye but I refused to look at him. I spent the rest of the day with Uriah and Christina following them around like a third wheel. I split from them after dinner and moved to the Atrium once again, it was the closest thing to home with the way the plants grew in a wild fashion. I settled in the middle of the room with my back on the ground hoping to see the stars the way I used to be able to on the rooftops of Chicago.

I had done a lot of crying recently but this time I didn't stop the silent tears that ran down my cheeks when I realized the sky was very different here than it was back home. When the tears finally dried on my cheeks I opened my eyes again, I must have fallen asleep on the floor. I rolled over and hopped up onto my feet. I slowly made my way back to the dorm, I was in no rush to be around anyone right now. I paused when I saw Nita outside the dorm room tapping her foot.

"Well lucky for me that I don't have to ask Tobias to get you." She called out to me as I got closer.

"What do you mean?"

"I have to show you guys something." Nita explained. Four popped out of the room right after and looked surprised to see me.

"You look worried." He said as he took in Nit's appearance.

"I am, come on let's go." She said as she turned to lead us down the dim hallways. We reached a door that was different from the others. This one did not have a security sensor. The room we stepped into was a wide circle with dark polished wooden floors with sheets of metal covering them. On the metal panels were names.

"These are the Chicago family trees." Nita explained before turning to Four and pointing to one. "Your family tree." Four looked around the room and scanned the walls for names.

"It's matriarchal." Nita said. Four approached the wall and I drew closer to get a better look. There was a vertical line between his mother and fathers names and his beneath them. Next to his name was an AD and then a dot.

"The first letter is your faction of origin, the second is your faction of choice. They thought it would help in keeping track of the genes." Nita's voice broke the quiet.

"I appreciate you showing this to us but why did we have to do this in the middle of the night?" Four asked after tracing his family lines up the wall. "I don't want any more reassurance that my limits don't define me."

"No, but I'm glad you said that. It was a test. I wanted to know if I could trust you. See I'm not really on board with being classified as damaged." Her gaze shifted to mine as she got closer to Four. "I think you aren't either."

"No." Four spat out as he shuffled away from her.

"There are a lot of secrets here. One of them is that GD is expandable, another is that some of us are not going to sit back and take it." Nita explained.

"What do you mean expendable?" I asked her, the worry began to build.

"They have committed heinous crimes against us, in short we are working against them for good reason and we want you with us."

"What exactly do you want from us?"

"I want to show you what it looks like outside the compound."

"In return?"

"Your protection. It is dangerous where I'm going and I can't tell anyone about it. You are outsiders which means it's safer to trust you and I know you can defend yourselves. I'll show you the evidence if you decide to come." Nita explained as her eyes shifted between the two of us.

"Fine."

"You have to understand you can't tell anyone about this. Not even Tris." Nita shot Four a look.

"She's trustworthy." I snorted lightly as Four jumped to defend her once again.

"It's not that I don't trust her, she just doesn't have the skills I need and there is no point endangering someone for no reason." Nita shifted closer to me this time. "The Bureau doesn't want us to believe we are not damaged, otherwise their life's work is a shame. No one wants to hear that. If you tell anyone else you are depriving them of the choice I am giving you now. You would be protecting them by keeping it a secret."

Four ran his fingers over his name on the wall once more.

"Show us."