Non Verbal

60

This is sort of short, sorry, but it made sense to leave it there lol. I hope this is ok, remember to vote and comment, it gives me motivation:) Sorry for the long gap. 

Rowan's POV. 

The ritual has changed.

And I am slightly exhausted of this.

But well, it'll mean that my side gets a break from bruises.

I don't know what the ritual is now necessarily, I know I probably shouldn't talk for a while though. Until I do know what the compulsion has changed to.

Maybe it just won't be anything. Maybe it'll just go away. Maybe it's just keeping quiet again, I don't mind this one.

And that thought in itself means I should probably get out of bed and go downstairs and take my medication. To actively try and fight this but well you see, Lottie is lying with her head on my arm, her arm over me, keeping herself close to me. So I didn't want to move until she woke up on her own.

This is still super weird to me, that she is here, that she was so fucking kind to me last night.

She's always so kind though, really.

Not always to others.

But to people she cares about.

God anyone who has experienced Lottie Richardson caring about them should count themselves lucky.

Because this feeling is without a doubt exactly what everyone talks about.

I lift my hand to run over her hair, gently so not to bug her but so as she sleeps, she could feel the comfort, the affection pouring out of me. Sometimes I feel like I am genuinely only touching her for her sake. Which confuses me because that's how it always was with India, I would only do anything with her to make her happy/ out of obligation.

And with Lottie it's so strange because the want to make her happy and to make her feel good is the same as I've always had with other people. But it feels so different, I just want her to feel good, all the time, with me. It's confusing.

This shit is confusing for me, I guess because I am less experienced. And because my brain works slightly differently than others. I second guess things.

Obviously.

She doesn't stir, which makes me slightly miserable. But also she was comfy, hell she looked so comfy that it was making me feel even more tired. I need to get medication and start my morning, but instead I move myself down, wrap her up closer and she smiles sleepily, her eyes sort of opening to look at me.

I close my eyes.

Tired again now, I could have gone back to sleep.

She lets out a comfy sigh, a happy, warm sigh... "Morning."

I shush her, I shouldn't have hugged her tighter, I didn't mean to wake her up.

I just keep my eyes closed, my nose becoming squashed as she moved her face up and pressed her face against my own.

I pull an annoyed face and she laughs, I guess feeling my frown against her face.

Lottie sits up and pulls out of my arms, sitting crossed legged next to me and pulling the covers away slightly.

I huff, opening my eyes to look at her with annoyance.

She smiles down at me, her face sleepy, hair a mess and she had hardly finished taking off her makeup last night, so her eyes were dark rimmed.