Imagines And Preferences Pt.2 🐴🌅🏈🥤🍺🍰😎🚗

Curtis Sister(Alone)

I sat in my dim room, on my bed; Looking at my wall.

"I don't know what to do..I mean; I can't find a way to talk to the guy I love, I can't talk to those kids at school...I can't find any way to actually be social." I sighed

If your wondering who I'm talking to...I was talking to no one; Not Darry or Ponyboy or Soda or anyone in the gang. Not even a friend or pet.

I didn't even have a friend anyway and we've haven't had a pet in this house since mom and dad died.

I was talking to nothing but thin air. Well if you look deep into reality I'm talking to thin air.

But, in my perspective my Parents were sitting across from me; hearing ever word I had to say.

Sometimes it was my favorite fictional characters but in the loneliest of days...like today;It was my parents.

"I feel so lonely; so cold. I mean-I know I have Darry, Soda, Ponyboy and the Gang. But, If I tell them anything like a secret they'll just tell eachother and it'll become some whole lecture...I need a friend; someone who I can actually talk to."

I go like this for hours.

Whenever I have nothing better to do I just talk to my imaginary recreated parents.

"Why don't you try talking to that boy you like? Try to warm up to him." I created a response in my head, but in My perspective it was my Mother's voice.

"I mean I tried talki-"

I froze.

Reality suddenly struck me.

I found myself in my cold, dim, empty room alone.

Just a crazy person who has no friends...Who talks to their subconscious mind that creats imaginary images of their deceased family members or non living fictional characters.

In order to numb themselves from the cold bitter pain of being alone.

I sat there frozen.

I wanted to cry...But, I couldn't let out the tears.

I was just; Numb

"I'm worthless...Crazy and worthless; If I disappeared today no one would care-Why am I even trying?" I whispered to myself

I lied on my bed, I thought about the kids in my school, specifically the ones who I wished noticed me, talk to me, considered me as a friend.

I thought of my not just crush but the person I loved. Who possibly doesn't feel the same way I do.

The pain stung.

There was a knot in my throat.

Yet nothing; Not a tear.

"Y/N! We're home! We got takeout tonight! My treat!" Soda yelled from the living room.

I got up, leaving my room.

The next thing I knew I was looking down at a plate of takeout. With no apatite.

"Y/N; You okay? You haven't touched your food." Soda said

"I'm-I'm alright." I gave a fake smile "So, How was everyone's day?" I tried changing the subject.

"It was good, Coach says I'm eligible for a scholarship if I keep on with track.". Ponyboy said

"My day was good-Me and Steve won tonight's drag race." Soda smiled

"My day was good too but, my back hurts something awful...Soda can I get one of your famous back rubs after this?" Darry asked

"Of course!"

"How was your day Y/N?" Darry asked

"Good."

"That's nice." Soda smiled

I stood silent for the next five minutes.

"I'm gonna get ready for bed." I got up grabbing my untouched plate.

"You haven't touched you food one bit Y/N; Are you alright? Is something wr-"

"I just...don't feel hungry today, you can give this to Twobit if he wants any leftovers tomorrow."

I left quickly.

I lying on my bed, under my covers.I felt a tear, then two, then three.

I then went to Sobbing, uncontrollably, silently.

Alone.

Suddenly I felt a weight behind me, followed by a arm wrapping around me.

A similar scent of lavender overcame me; Soda.

"Sh,sh,sh. It's okay Y/N, it's alright." He cooed "We're right here."

I sat up quickly;Looking around. The whole gang standing, staring with concern.

Great I thought.

I cradled myself against the cold wall. Sobbing.

"Y/N...Why are you crying?" Soda got closer to me, Ponyboy decided to sit besides Soda.

"Nothing...It's nothing important." I sobbed

"Y/N..."

"It's stupid." I quivered

"Please Y/N, just tell us...I bet ya it ain't stupid."

I looked up, wiping my tears. I took a deep breath.

"I just feel so Alone; like no one cares if I were gone. I can't find ways to talk to people-I always make things awkward, I'm so scared if people will think I'm stupid or annoying. Maybe I am...Maybe that's the reason no one want to talk to me...the reason why I have no friends...I'm nothing but a worthless, lonely person who can't find any courage to talk to people."

Soda grabbed my hand tightly, looking into my eyes.

"Your not worthless...Your not stupid and your not annoying.
Y/N; You are the most beautiful, caring, loving, kind hearted person in this whole world. You shouldn't beat yourself up for not knowing how to start up a conversation...You'll get there eventually and I'm sure when you do and when you find the courage to talk to someone; They'll appreciate you more than you'd ever think."

"He's right. You'll get by eventually and there's always someone to find you-talk to you, even though you haven't found them yet."Ponyboy added

"It doesn't mean if you have no friends you ain't worth something...Your as important as anything else in this world Y/N." Darry stated

"Trust me...Things aren't as bad as they seem and you'll eventually find people who value you...That time just ain't now. And sometimes you gotta be the one to show people your value."

I looked up at all of them "Thanks guys...I don't know what if do without you."

"We don't know what we'd do without you either Y/N" Soda smiled

Everyone gathered up around, for a bear hug.

I felt warmth, comfort and hope

Maybe tomorrow I'll go out and show my value, talk to someone and hopefully find a friend

A/N

Hey Guys, so I know this imagine was short I think? But this one does have some important meaning.

It's kinda a message to people who are alone that there's still hope for making a friend.

To not overthink and go for it.

I know it can be hard because they seem as if they aren't interested. But, trust me with a little conversation, it can go a long way.

Remember your not alone

You are valued

You mean something to this world

Even if you don't feel it.

Stay Gold 🐴 🌅 💛