Crushed with love (Crush Imagines)

There For You

Warning: This story contains themes of a lost loved one. If this will cause you major distress please proceed with caution or skip this part. 

You were on autopilot. 

You did what you were required to do but the entire time you were stuck in your head, unfeeling and nearly thoughtless, all you could think was...

He was really gone. 

Your brother had been punched by a mate's mate the night before. He had gone crashing to the ground, smacking his head against the concrete and ending his life instantly. 

He was gone. Just like that.

You didn't know how to cope. You hadn't experienced loss before, no one close to you had passed and now your realized you had taken that for granted. 

So you just kept going.

You were going to see your mum that evening but you had made the decision to get through the day first. You had to work, you had to stay distracted. As much as you knew the boys at your work would understand, you couldn't bring yourself to tell them.

Instead, you walked into work, held together by a thin thread, greeting everyone with a smile. Tonight you would allow yourself to grieve. It was the weekend tomorrow, you just had to get through.

Truthfully, you felt if you told them, you'd be a burden, it was ridiculous, the whole thought process was silly but everyone reacted differently to this kind of thing and you just knew that if you told them, no work would be done. 

You worked for a small business as a camera girl, recording different videos for social media, you also helped with the editing for certain series they did. Working behind the scenes for Victoria, Spencer and C/n was the best.

"Morning." You smiled, hugging everyone, even if it were over the shoulder. 

"How are you Y/n/n?" Spencer questioned, working on some video ideas. 

"Great." He didn't make it obvious but he knew instantly something was off in your tone. "How are you?" 
"Good, good. You ready to record?" 
"Straight into it?" 
"Yeah." C/n appeared behind you, handing you a coffee. "We've got to get part two up from the other day recorded and edited for Monday." He reminded you.

"That's right." You smiled. Even his eyes, which usually filled your chest with butterflies couldn't change the way you felt today.

"Let's get sorted lovelies." Victoria squeezed your shoulder. 

The crew set up and you stood behind the camera, panning and zooming when you felt it right, the trust they had in you felt nice, it added a sense of security and routine for the day. Watching C/n do his thing, you forgot the world for a while.

Until you felt your phone buzz.

You slipped it from your pocket, a message from your mother. 

This one do you think? 
She asked you, regarding the picture of your brother that she attached for the funeral. You remembered that day, you had just got him a puppy for his birthday, his smile glowed as he held it close. 

You broke. 

You moved away from the camera, hurrying from the room and shutting yourself in the storage room, tears flooding your eyes, silent sobs wracking your chest. 

The room you left fell silent, the three on-camera confused by your departure. Spencer, your best friend at work followed you. 

"She looked distraught," Victoria commented. 
"I hope everything's okay." C/n wrapped his arms around himself, watching the door.

"Y/n?" Spencer questioned as he entered the room with caution. "What's going on? What's wrong?" He didn't hesitate to hug you, seeing you in such a state. 

"I'm sorry... I didn't... I didn't want this to happen, I didn't want to burden you guys... I didn't want to worry you... but I can't... my brother... my brother was killed last night." You sobbed into his should. 
"Y/n, oh my goodness." He held you closer. "Listen to me, we all care about you, you will never burden us, we're here for you, I'm so sorry." 

"I'm sorry." 

"Stop apologising. It's okay. We're here, we want to be here for you. Never be scared to tell us these kinds of things. I feel so sick for you Y/n/n... you need to go home to your family..." 

"Are you sure?" You mumbled. 
"We'll manage, we'll miss you, we'll be thinking of you... but you are more important right now... as your boss, I'm telling you all three of us want you to go." Spencer insisted. 

You nodded, unable to trust your voice, you gave him one last hug before passing everyone to go to the elevator. 

C/n's eyes followed you, standing to his feet, he struggled to look away from you to ask Spencer why you looked so broken. His heart was racing, hands fidgeting nervously. 

"What happened? What's wrong?" 
"Her brother... he died... she didn't want to worry us with it. I sent her home to be with her family, told her we'd be okay." 
C/n hadn't been listening, all he had heard was that your brother had died, that you were grieving, that you were broken and shattered and hadn't felt as if you mattered enough to tell them, not worth interrupting their work. 

He knew so different, you needed to see it too.

He knew he couldn't stay away, so without another word, he left, starting the trip about ten minutes behind you, to your parent's house an hour away...

...

What happens next I wonder?

Do we want a part two?

I know this is a bit heavier and I am sorry to anyone who has been through or is going through this, my thoughts and heart are with you. 

It is important to let yourself feel and find comfort in the people closest to you.

Anyway... Hopefully, I will be updating more often. 

I hope your day/night is a bubble of happiness,

~Brei :)