Numb ---- Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugo----[BOOK 1]

62 - Nicotine

time skip to nighttime

Bakugo's POV:

I helped Todoroki clean his wounds and I wrapped his hands, putting gauze pads under the tape on his knuckles.

Eventually, it was time for bed. Todoroki had been sleeping better than normal, but I could tell he was still exhausted all the time. Maybe from working out so much, or mental stress, or maybe just being unmotivated. I didn't know why and he never wanted to talk about it.

We laid down and got ready to go to sleep. I turned over on my side, and he laid on his back facing the ceiling. I closed my eyes.

"What's wrong with me?" He asked quietly.

"There's nothing wrong with you."

I rolled over to face him.

"You just have internal issues and habits and instincts that are bad but it's not your fault. It's just a result of everything that's happened. I'm sorry. But it'll get better."

"I guess. It's just that things are okay right now. I have you, I saw my mom again, I'm leaving U.A., and I dunno. It's just a lot of changes and it's scary. And I want to rely on you through all of this but I need to break that habit. I'm... I dunno..... I'm just too dependent on you."

"It's not your fault. It's your father's. You've never really had anyone to lean on. But Todoroki, you're not overly dependent. The only difference is you have somebody to help you and that's okay. Everybody should."

"I guess. Still though. I can't rely on you for everything. I need to at least try to work things out in my head on my own, otherwise I'll never be able to if you leave."

"Who said I was leaving?"

"Well you were just helping me out when it was really bad. But now things are getting better for me. What if you end up realizing that in reality, you just didn't want me to die. Wanting me to stay alive and actually needing me in your life are two very different things."

It's funny

That you're so worried about all of this

"Don't overthink this. You're wrong. I'm not leaving. Okay?"

You've got it backwards

"I guess. I'll sleep on it." He rolled over.

I'm the one

"Goodnight."

Who's scared that you'll leave

"Night."

You needed me before

Otherwise you'd be dead

Or at least pretty damn close

You needed help

But you're right

Things are getting better

What if when you're better

You don't need me anymore?

I've been here for you through all this shit

All the abuse

The self harm

The suicide attempts

The drugs

The panic attacks

Pulled all nighters just letting you cry on my shoulder