The Cases Of NCIS Agents

PREFRENCE #23 (Part 1) - 💎UPDATED+PUBLISHED💎

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SHE/HER PRONOUNS USED (REFERENCED TO AS GIRLFRIEND)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PART 1/2

THEY HELP YOU WITH YOUR ESTROGEN SHOT! ALSO YES MCGEE IS FTM FIGHT ME! ABBY AND DUCKY IN ANOTHER PART!

TRIGGER WARNING : NEEDLES, INJECTIONS, BODY DYSMORPHIA, TALKING BADLY ABOUT ONESELF, MAYBE SWEARING? (IF THERE IS ANY I MISS LET ME KNOW!)

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Gibbs -
Estragon day. One of the few days you both loved and hated, why? Well, it was a mixture of things. One thing you hated, the gender dysphoria, having to take Estragon reminded you that you were not biologically a female. One thing you loved, the gender euphoria, getting to have the hormones which made you sound more feminine and gave you more prominently feminine features made you feel so happy. Another thing you hated, that you had to wait for these things to change, it could take awhile to really be able to notice the changes and that sucked. But you were determined to be able to get through this day without hating it, and luckily you had your amazing boyfriend Gibbs to help you. You hadn't really let him help too much in the past, feeling a little exposed at the idea of him seeing you do the injection, but you had been trying to get better. So today you had decided that you would let Gibbs be in the bathroom when you did it. Plus you had been having a bad day and just wanted to spend more time with Gibbs, so this was a good excuse, but also helped you with one of your fears. You hadn't told Gibbs yet and it was kind of a scary thought. How do you tell your boyfriend you want him to watch you stab yourself with a needle? It was abit of a strange request in hindsight, but that didn't matter, you were still going to ask him. Maybe not that exact question though. You headed into the basement where Gibbs had been for awhile now, working on his boat while he waited for you to be done with the Estragon shot. As soon as Gibbs saw you, he smiled and walked over. "You all done babe?" He asked and kissed your cheek. "I- no....could you um...come and sit in the bathroom....like- while I do it?..." you asked quietly, stumbling as you tried to find the right words. "Of course darling, anything you want" Gibbs said gently, a small smile on his face as he left his boat work and walked to the bathroom with you. He sat down on the counter and smiled reassuringly. You sat down on the toilet and took a deep breath before taking the needle in your hand and injecting your leg. It felt scary to have Gibbs watch, but you felt so much better when he was closer, so it was fine. You would get used to it.

Dinnozzo -
You were shitting yourself. Your first ever Estragon injection ever! It was exciting and scary, but you knew that Dinizzo would be there with you, and that helped you calm down abit. Only abit though. It didn't matter that your boyfriends hand was in your own as he drove you to the hospital, it didn't matter that your boyfriends hand was in your own as you sat waiting in the waiting room, or the your boyfriends hand was in your own as you sat down on the examination table, you were still terrified. What if something went wrong? What if they decided you couldn't have it last minute? What if Tony doesn't- "Baby, you haven't said a word since we left the house, talk to me." Tony interrupted your intrusive thoughts, and the sound of his voice and the relaxing realization that he was rubbing his thumbs of your knuckles made you take a deep breath and finally speak up. "What if something happens? What if it goes wrong or I can't have the injection? Or what if.....what if you don't like me after they start working?.." You whisper, not quite looking up at Tony as you sat there, beginning to play with his fingers anxiously. That thought had been plaguing your mind since you got accepted to actually have the injections. What if he didn't like how you look or sounded after the Estrogen started to take effect? "...you think that I wouldn't like you after becoming a little more feminine?.." Tony whispers back, the same quiet whispering you had done previously. You nod your head at the question and close your eyes. "It can change how you look- not by much- but what if I look....what if I look ugly more feminine?..." You mutterd, slowly leaning into Tony, your head on his chest. "Hey...hey baby- I would never think you are ugly, because you will never be ugly. And you are going to look even more stunning than you do now, if that is even possible. Hey! How about we go out on a date tonight? You can wear that really pretty dress and I'll dress up in a suit, then we can go for a meal, yeah?" He suggested, making you glance up and smiled softly. "Yeah....that sounds good.." You said gently, kissing his cheek. "Your amazing..you know that right?" You say, a small giggle escaping your lips. "I do try." Tony whispers before the doctor walked in. The shot seemed to be the fastest thing you have ever experienced, and you've had Gubbs drive you. With Tony there to reassure you, everything wasn't as scary.

McGee - (he is trans dude - you come out to him and tell him you want to go on estrogen)
You and McGee had been together for a few years now, and it was the happiest you had ever been. McGee had told you he was a trans man within the first month and obviously you were fine with it. You didn't care what gender he was or what was in his pants, you just cared about him. You where just two guys in a loving and caring relationship. That's what you had told him all that time ago. So maybe that's why you felt worried about telling McGee you wanted to transition into a women and go on Estrogen? Practically practically whole basis of your trusting relationship had been that conversation, so would telling him you weren't a man change that? Surely not...right? You knew he would understand that transgender side of things, probably better than anyone else you knew, but what about the romantic side of things? McGee had told you he was Gay. You had told him you were Gay, but maybe you weren't Gay after all? Maybe you were just a women who liked men? And that was scary. Trying to tell your gay boyfriend that your a women is not an easy task. That's why you took your time. You let yourself accept that this is who you were first, let yourself get comfortable with that, then decided to tackle talking to McGee. You did it when you were both home off work for the day, wanting it to be easy to go and hide away from the world if needed, though you were trying to keep your hopes up. That was why you were both currently sat on the couch, McGee watching the TV and you trying to start the conversation. You really weren't sure how to start, so you decided to keep it simple. "Can I talk to you about something please?" You asked quietly, looking to McGee. He nodded and turned his full body to you, a small smile on his face as he mutterd a yep. "Okay...so-so I have been thinking about this for...for a long time and I think-no...no I am..a women..not-not a man....i want to transition and go on Estrogen and if you want to break up because of that then...then we can but I really don't want to loose you..." You rambled slightly, looking at the floor as you spoke, anxiety filling up in your stomach. There was silence for a few minutes, making you close your eyes in fear. Until you felt a familiar pair of arms wrapped around your torso. "I guess I'm not gay then, huh?" Was all you heard, making all of the fear and worry melt away, and a small smile appear on your face.

Palmer -
It wasn't like you were never going to tell him. Not forever anyway. Just until you knew he wouldn't leave you- not that you thought he would- but you cant help the doubt creeping in. You knew Palmer was accepting of everyone and that he loved you with all his heart, so why did it seem impossible to tell him you were a trans women? You had been dating for nearly 4 months now, and you felt bad. You never went further than kissing (not that that's a bad thing) but you didn't know if Jimmy wanted more if he was happy with just the kissing alone. So you waited for the right time to tell him. And waited. And waited and waited and waited and finally you couldn't wait anymore. Finally, you cracked and let it spill that you were born a Male but transitioned to female at a young age and had been in Estrogen for a couple if years. It was wierd. Jimmy just nodded, kissed your cheek, and went back to rambling about some medical stuff you didn't really understand. You tried to ask him if he cared but everytime he would shit you down with a kiss, which really answerd the question for you.