Tough Love (Book 2)

21. Anger

~Ryan Kelly~

I got dressed in all black, jeans and a shirt without a tie. I let out a sigh and walked out of the walk-in closet and looked at Nolwazi. She was still cuffed.

"Ryan..." she called weakly. "Please Ryan... uncuff me..."

I put on my watch.

"You can't keep me here, I gave you what you wanted."

I went to get her injection and the bottle of Mandrax.

"Please Ryan... I need to pee..."

I got on the bed as I filled the needle halfway. A little too much.

"No... not again, please," she begged trying to fight.

She was too weak.

I injected her and got off the bed. I left the injection and bottle on the bedside table then looked at her. I kind of felt bad. She used to be my friend...

Today I had more important things to worry about. As I was leaving the room, I heard Nolwazi speak.

"Ryan... don't leave... please..." a barely audible plea.

I stopped in my tracks and looked at her. She only wore lingerie, I didn't even cover her. I wanted to turn around and at least throw a blanket over her but I remembered her laughing at my pain.

"I'm sorry Nolwazi," I stated.

I then left.

~Leon Kelly~

I looked at my reflection and let out a sigh. Nothing could fill the deep, hollow, dark empty void in my chest. I felt like I was back at square one.

I was going to try going to the cemetery today. I hadn't done that since the burial. I had no excuse not to go. I drive past it everyday. But each time I do, I look at the road ahead. I never take a peak, I never turn my attention to it even slightly.

I havent even made plans to get the headstone installed and its been a year.

My mother sure would be disappointed in me.

First I failed to make Zee happy, then I was drinking and smoking weed, and now I've abandoned her grave. I'm a horrible son. If she were still here, she'd beat the shit out of me and then she'd yell till I go deaf.

I really miss her.

Maybe after visiting her resting place I could go to her house. I last went there two weeks ago to do some cleaning. Yes, no one lives there but, my mother hated a dirty or dusty home. Her garden though, it's dying slowly. There aren't as many flowers anymore. And vegetable patch stopped growing vegetables.

It's really sad.

So I went to the cemetery and walked to the grave with a fresh bouquet of flowers. I couldn't help but walk extra slow as the heaviness in my chest returned. It seemed to drag me down. If the ground beneath me wasn't solid, I'd probably sink into the ground as if I'm walking in quicksand.

My chest was tight and every breath was hard to take. My chest couldn't expand as usual and the little air I took in wasn't enough to keep me calm. As a result I was walking with blurry vision. When I blinked, my vision cleared but tears rolled down my cheeks.

I stood at a grave and looked at the slab of stone on the ground.

Elaine Kelly

1960~2018

I got down on one knee and lay the flowers down. I bowed my head and closed my eyes and took a minute of silence.