Closer than Ever

Chapter 40 - Menace to World Peace

It's just one of those days. First, I slip climbing out of the bathtub and high-center my crotch on the edge, which hurts like you wouldn't believe. Then the toaster gets stuck down and burns my toast to cinders, setting off the smoke detector, which wakes up Taehyung. I mean, he is supposed to be up already anyway, but he's a little grumpy about the noise and the smoke.

I put my toe through the first stocking I put on, and the strap on my purse breaks as soon as I sling it over my shoulder. Tae's face is equal parts amused and concerned by the time we're ready to leave the house.

He drives me the three blocks to the nearest bus stop and drops me off, even though we're going to the same destination. We can't be seen arriving together, of course, and it's better that I'm usually about 20 minutes later than he is. The first time he drove to a bus stop, I was horrified that somebody might recognize him and it would be splashed all over the tabloids, but I realize that I've actually gotten used to this particular bit of silliness. As Tae drives off, I see that my bus has just pulled away. That figures.

At work, I recognize Bang PD coming down the hall and nod to him, but manage to trip over nothing in the process and almost face-plant. So, yeah, the boss probably thinks I'm a morning drinker now. Humiliating.

Things don't get any better in the studio. When I sit down at my desk and grab the armrests to scoot my chair forward, the right one comes off in my hand. Taehyung sees the whole thing and laughs his ass off. "Namjoon-hyung? Is that you?" he cackles. He starts referring to me as the "Goddess of Destruction."

Worst of all, a couple of hours later, I somehow delete two entire songs-worth of lyrics from my laptop, and can't get them back using the undo button or the edit history. We finally have to call in an IT girl, who goes 'click, click, click' and restores the files instantly. I am grateful, but also slightly miffed about her efficient competence and her smug little nod as she leaves.

As soon as we have the room to ourselves, Taehyung starts in on me. "Birdie, I want to hug you and make you feel better, but I'm afraid I'll get injured," he teases. "I'm wishing you well today from over here, OK?" He scoots his chair a little further from me, blows me a kiss and then laughs some more, his big, boxy mouth open wide.

"Watch it, bub!" I giggle back. "You won't like me when I'm angry!" I snarl and do a Hulk-style muscle pose at him from my seat.

Tae jumps up and does a series of four or five poses as if he's a contestant in a bodybuilding competition. I catcall and try to whistle, but it's impossible because I'm laughing too hard.

We settle down to work again. Actually, I just sit there forlorn with my hands in my lap and stare at the screen for about twenty minutes. He is working at the soundboard with his headphones on, his face pouting with concentration, but he glances over and then turns to watch me. "Birdie, are you OK?" he asks, grinning.

"Yeah, babe. I'm just afraid to touch anything now." I shoot him a tragic look. He throws his head back and laughs again. I slump in my seat, defeated.

"I have an idea," he says. "Let's go home and put you back to bed for a nap. Reset the day. Then, when you get up again, maybe things will go better."

I look around, sigh heavily, and say, "I think that's probably a good idea, love. We have to try something! I'm a menace right now!"

We head toward the elevator down to the parking structure. I hesitate and look at Tae. "It'll be OK, just don't touch anything!" he laughs.

"Alright, but whatever happens isn't my fault," I reply, making a yikes face.

He pushes the button and gently touches my shoulder to guide me into the lift, visibly trying to suppress his laughter. Once the doors close, he leans in next to my ear and says in his huskiest voice, "Eunen Sae, haven't you ever fantasized about being stuck in an elevator with a handsome stranger?"