Fart story one-shots 2!

Early Study of the Stercus Partum Flower

Summary:

A new species of flower has been discovered on a long forgotten terraformed planet. Its developed a particularly interesting way of ensuring its species survival among the strange alien jungle. Below are notes on its most outstanding features, as well as details on the first human encounter of the plant by one Samus Aran.

The Stercus Partum flower is among one of nature's most extraordinary creations. Like Earth's Venus flytrap, the plant's perseverance in inhospitable environments has lead nature to ingenious innovations to ensure the longevity of the species.

Unlike virtually every Earth flower that slowly opens its petals in a slow bloom, the Stercus's bloom is rapid and sudden. The flower holds back its contents at a high pressure like a taut balloon waiting to pop. Hundreds of thousands of tiny spores buzz about the pressured space. Yellow pollen, not unlike what's found on Earth whirls around, sits ready to be dispatched in a sudden bomb-like burst.

What sets off this explosion of reproductive cells? That's part of the genius of Stercus Partum. The plant uses its flowers as a defense mechanism. Should it sense an animal that could disturb or threaten it, the plants flowers bloom in a pollen explosion and scatter spores everywhere. One plant's bloom encourages surrounding neighbors to dispel their pollen stockpiles. In scarcely any time, a community of the Stercus can disarm a potential threat and use it for its own purposes.

One Samus Aran was the first to discover the flower. A missing persons situation had spurred her to investigate the far off planet SR6377 from an anonymous tip off. The desolate jungle planet is a mostly undisturbed planet left to evolve to its whims after a terraforming project to foster the creation of interesting lifeforms.

Ms. Aran was able to recall her experience in impressive detail. Stepping on a wayward exposed tree root apparently caused the plant to detect her presence. Unfortunately, Ms. Aran had been hasty in her exploration and had not donned the typical power suit mandated by the federation for exploration of unknown planets. Ms. Aran was out on the planet in nothing more than her skin tight Zero Suit that day, leaving her head perfectly exposed to the wilderness. Ms. Aran's report recalls in vivid detail having a Stercus flower bloom directly in her face, with several others blooming alongside it to thoroughly douse her in spores. The shock and sudden inhalation of so many spores had Ms. Aran in a coughing fit, sitting on the floor of the jungle.

Now comes the most remarkable feature of the Stercus. It's pollen spores are optimized so that little, if anything, goes to waste. While precious few will eventually meet the gametes of other flowers and form a fertile seed, there are vast quantities of unused pollen left. This leaves vast amounts of it to maliciously interact with animals.

The tiny spores of the pollen are wrapped in a hydrophobic seal containing within it high pressure fiber masses, water, simple sugars, and unknown hormones, pheromones, and various other chemicals. Should the pollen enter the airways through the nose, it'll temporarily disable the use of the orifice for breathing, thus forcing the oral cavity as the lone rout for the spores.

Should pollen be inhaled through the alimentary canal, it manages a magnificent feat. The spores are somehow able to opt out of traveling through the respiratory system and instead travel into the unlucky subjects stomach. The stomach acids of a digestive system significantly weaken the outer layer of the pollen. Weakened and unsteady, in the jejunum the spores burst with their high pressure contents and increase in volume well over 1000 times! The strange chemicals somehow prompt the bowels to change into a hyper efficient nutrient absorbing, waste producing machine. Fecal matter rapidly and violently fills the subject's bowels. Involuntary release comes not much later.