Fart story one-shots 2!

GROSS PHEROMONES

I'm a gross person. I'm gonna tell you that right off the bat. This story is about the gross stuff that comes out of my ass, and the effect it has on people.

I've always known there was something strange about me. Even as a little girl. Whenever I got done using the potty - I mean going number two - there was a good chance my mom and dad would start giving each other looks, and then head off to the bedroom together. They weren't shy, either: they'd say something like, "We're going to try making you another sister to play with. Won't that be fun?"

"Sure!"

Then I'd hear the bed squeaking from upstairs, while they went about their vigorous baby-making. I ended up with four little sisters this way.

As I got older, I slowly realized that my digestive system produced some kind of sex pheromone or aphrodisiac, and it came out whenever I pooped or farted. I wasn't immune to my own scent, either: whenever I passed gas, I got as horny as anyone else.

Over time, I learned to keep a lid on myself. I became the sort of buttoned-up woman who never farts in public, and who only poops when she's alone in the house.

I've endured my share of awkwardness for this. If you're a guy, you may not understand how gross girls can be after eating large meals together. It wasn't hard to notice that I was holding it in - the only girl not farting, or not blowing up the bathroom - and soon I had a reputation for being stuck-up. I can't really blame them: when one person is holding back, it makes everyone else feel awkward.

Sometimes I'd fart accidentally, of course - everyone does. Whenever it happened, I'd notice the effects on my friends immediately. Their faces would flush, and our conversation would quickly pivot to the guys we liked and what we hoped to do to them. But our horniness would subside eventually, and nothing weird would usually happen.

In my early 20s I had some health issues, and my pheromones seemed to get weaker for a couple of years... but as I recovered, they came back with a vengeance. The incident I'm about to describe happened during when I was 24, while my pheromones were growing more powerful than ever.

I was hanging out with my best friend, Kat. We'd been close friends in high school and community college, and we've only gotten closer since then. But now she was going back to school for her bachelors degree, and I hadn't seen her in months. She'd changed a little: she had become a vegan, for instance. She'd been pretty "girly" in high school - lots of pink, great makeup, very interested in boys - but now she'd developed more of an indie streak. She wore her dark hair in a sloppy ponytail, and she had tight threadbare jeans and a man's button-down shirt.

I've always been jealous of Kat, to be honest. Skinny with a small ass, she could wear any clothes she wanted. I'm much trickier to dress. Although I'm average weight, my butt and thighs are huge compared to my waistline. I hardly have any boobs, so I can't fill out a dress... but my nipples are always poking out, so I can never go braless, either. Kat, of course, has had perfect tits since puberty.

She came over my house for lunch, and we spent a few hours catching up. Kat lived in an crowded apartment at her college, while I still hadn't moved out of my parents' place.

Kat had no boyfriend; in fact, she hadn't gotten laid in months. Personally, I was luckier in that respect; I've never had much trouble finding hookups, as you can probably imagine. We ran a few errands together and went for a bike ride, and in the evening we decided to chill in my parents' basement and watch TV - just like old times. For dinner, Kat whipped up something vegan-friendly. It was a sort of bean-and-spinach casserole, using leftovers from my fridge.

After we ate, we settled on the couch together. We found a show we liked on Netflix and started binge-watching.

It wasn't long, however, before I started feeling gassy. The first time I needed to fart, I pretended I'd forgotten something upstairs. The second time, I excused myself and used the bathroom for a few minutes.