Table For Two

14 - Harvey

We split the bill in the end... even though I would have paid. I know Ali was only making a joke but hanging out today has been so much more fun than I could have thought it would be. And compared to the date with Dylan? Hell, Ali is proof that there are some decent people out there and maybe I shouldn't give up.

We eventually get up and leave after paying and head back out. It's not that warm anymore. The sunset is burning orange, pink and purple across the sky and a slight chill wind is beginning to sweep through. Yeah it is unmistakably autumn now. I stop to fold down my sleeves which I had bunched up around my elbows and Ali walks into me from behind, throwing us both. We both apologise at the exact same time and immediately get sheepish and blush.

"I shouldn't have stopped in the doorway"

"I should watch where I'm going"

"I- actually, no. No apology Olympics."

"...yeah, agreed."

We laugh and talk more as we head back to the car. I've found out a lot about him. Ali likes Allen Ginsburg, Formula 1, Wrestling, League of Legends, going out clubbing with Dee and playing guitar. He came out when he was nearly fourteen and it went down poorly but he didn't let that stop him or crush how he felt back down. He fought for it. I kind of envy him for that. When he talked about the first time he got in a fight, I could see a quiet seething behind his eyes that said he never let go of it - that injustice of having to defend who he was because no one else would help him. I can't help but sympathise. I never came out really. But to be so alone with how you feel and no one to help you... that I know all too well.

"...and then when mum got to the school. Well, I guess I found my advocate that day. I swear she looked ready to punch every teacher she spoke to."

"She was cool with it?"

"She gave me some crap for not telling her and her finding out because I got into a fight in school but... yeah she was for the most part. She got called in a few more times for me fighting and I'm pretty sure she wanted to murder after the last one but once I hit A-levels, I changed to a different sixth form and hardly anyone from my school went there so it all dropped off."

"Hmm..."

"What is it?"

"Just... I never had that. I-" I stop myself talking. I've never been honest about this before... at least not with someone I've known for such a short amount of time. I don't trust anyone with personal stuff like this. But Ali isn't like everyone else. He laughs and jokes with me, he is genuinely interested and engaged when I talk about things, he smiles at me and it feels nice... wow, listen to me talking like I am in the middle of some CW show. This is just cringeworthy.

We make it back to the car and Ali offers to drive me home. I tell him it isn't necessary but he won't hear it. He wants to make sure I get home safe and... I'm not going to pitch a fit for my own discomfort. I slot into the passenger seat and kind of slump down. Good food and sunshine are a great recipe for that nice kind of tiredness where you could nap for a few hours and wake up smiling. The drive back to the flat block isn't that long and the traffic is light. Ali pulls into the small car park down the side of the building.

"Okay, here we are."

"Thanks. You didn't have to drive me back."

"Door to door service. My pleasure."

"Did you..."

I stop, the question hanging in my throat and it won't come out for whatever stupid reason. Is he going to take it the wrong way? Is it going to cause a problem? Is he going to think I'm just trying to get with him?

"Are you okay?" I hear him ask as he reaches up and puts a hand on his shoulder. It's like an electric shock goes through my entire nervous system. My hand goes up to his and just... rests against and I swear I hear him make a sharp little intake of breath and his cheeks colour a little... what the fuck are we doing? Why are we like this?

"Yeah..." I finally muster the willpower to say "do you want to come in for a drink?"

"Uhh... is it alright if I don't? I still feel like shit from yesterday and could do with just collapsing into bed" he looks so shy and awkward when he says it. I feel a little deflated but... he's perfectly reasonable.

"Yeah, I get that. Uhh... did you wanna hang out again sometime soon?" I offer instead. Ali looks up and smiles at that.

"Okay. Want my number so we can stay in touch?"

"Sure!"

I unlock my phone and hand it to him and he quickly types in his number before handing it back. I say goodbye and get out of the car. I'm pretty sure I hear him move as if he was reaching towards me or leaning to say something but when I turn back he just waves as I shut the door and we go our separate ways. I watch him pull out of the car park and head home and can't help but feel just a tiny bit sad that he didn't want to stay.