Table For Two

55 - Ali

Is it possible to be addicted to another human being? Because I just want Harvey again and again and again. He is just... ugh I don't have the words for it. Embarrassing for a writer but whatever. I just know I want to be with him as often as life allows me to be. We head to the shower and... it's like what just happened has snapped Harvey's inhibitions about his body. He had been so uncertain on so many occasions but now he just seems so at home here with me. And he can't keep his hands off me. Which I am so not complaining about. I love it.

We somehow avoid getting frisky in the shower and end up back in bed... where we just go back to what we were doing before the shower. And we eventually decide to get out of bed and do things. Y'know, other than each other. We get dressed, with me stealing one of Harvey's shirts, and head down to gather up a blanket, Athena and the bag I take with me when I walk her before heading into town. Harvey actually takes Athena's lead and I take his free hand prisoner, leaning into him as we walk. His thumb is running over the back of my hand and whenever we stop to cross a road, he turns and kisses me on the cheek or on the top of the head. Every time he does, I feel like melting against him. How the hell does he do that? Literally, just making it so difficult to function like a human being every time he makes me aware of his existence.

We stop at a coffee shop for a much-needed caffeine pit stop and I wait with Athena while Harvey pays. We walk out of town towards the park and it is practically empty. I take the blanket out as Harvey takes Athena off the lead and immediately starts launching her favourite ball with his absolute cannon of an arm. And I love this. This is something I've never really had. And that is kind of a startling realisation that this guy - this impossible individual - is giving me a first. A proper relationship. Part of me wants to tear up but I refuse to be that sort of weepy bitch right now. It is true though. I'd spent so long just using guys for a thrill and then we both went our separate ways because it was easier that way. But Harvey I want to hold closer. Want more with. Want a life with. What a fucking thought that is.

"Penny for them?" Harvey says as he sits down next to me and immediately pulls me to him as Athena flumps down, panting. I sigh into Harvey's grasp and turn to cuddle him back.

"Just thinking is all"

"I could tell. You didn't make a single comment about my ability to throw a ball turning you on somehow. It was weird."

"You love it really"

"I do"

"But not the point right now"

"Exactly"

"I was just... thinking about us and all this and how much it means, you know?"

"You might have to offer up a little more than that, Ali."

I roll my eyes as I extricate myself from his arms so I can look at him.

"Just thinking about how this is all kind of new for me too. As in, being with someone properly. Openly. And I like it. I really like it. And I want more of it."

"Never realised you were so sweet."

"Shut up."

"Sorry. You know I love you, right?"

"Hm. No, you know it hasn't really come up before."

"Okay, smartass, well come here."

Harvey lunges and grabs me and it's all I can do to squeal a little and playfully fight back against him because, really, I just like the feeling of him wrapping his arms around me in any way. Athena huffs at us and gives us a look that says 'I am so past done with the pair of you' but we are too busy laughing to care. Harvey kisses me. I kiss him back. All is right with the world.

Once we calm down and just go back to lounging on each other in the park, despite the cold, an idea hits me.

"Do you want to go to Winter Ball together?"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know. It will be a lot of people and noise and I would have to wear a suit."

"Which you look hot as fuck in, incidentally, but I take your point."

"Why don't we go out to dinner instead?"

"Burgers and a movie?"

"Ha ha. No! I mean a real, proper nice dinner. I'll even dress smart for it."

"Honestly?"

"Cross my heart."

"Okay... yeah, lets do it!"