Table For Two

32 - Harvey

As a rule, I hate missing appointments or classes. I hate being late in general. But I am also aware that some circumstances mean that you can't always be where you are supposed to, when you are supposed to. Today definitely feels like one of those days. Ali was off most of the night. I am pretty sure us making out and me now being in his bed has probably not helped but that's on me for not saying something. I stupidly thought it would help. So when he wakes up and is still not okay, I do what I can to help. I hold him when he cries and hope it makes him feel slightly better. Athena is still a fairly terrifying presence but she's there for Ali... until he nearly launches her and she grumbles before stalking away. I'd be lying if I didn't feel a little less nervous with her not there.

The moment Ali is up checking his phone I do the same and realise, much like he has, that it is Monday and mid morning. I sigh, a little frustrated, and I immediately send a message to the group chat so Quinn and Erika can keep me up to date with anything I miss. Ali is the more important thing right now. Quinn replies back with a thumbs up and Erika with a paragraph I do not feel like reading at this moment so I just put my phone away.

Ali definitely is not coping with the idea of missing things and when he starts to stress and tailspin over it, I just hold him. The last thing he needs is me telling him that it's not a big deal or that it's going to be fine or he's being dramatic. Because I know how irritating that gets. So he just falls into my arms and I say "it's okay" because it is. Sometimes we're not okay.

I don't know how long we stay there like that. I think we nearly fall asleep again but Ali insists on getting up. He goes to shower and leaves me alone in his room. And it's the first time I have properly had to process things... well, at least things regard me and Ali.

Things are... good? weird? some really bizarre mixture of the two? I'm not really sure it can be summed up in a single word or phrase. I like him... like, I really like him. Will I ever admit how much out loud? Probably not but it is a significant amount. And I know Ali likes me back. The same way I like him? Maybe, I don't know. I realise I sound like a broken record. But Ali is stuck in my head like a song on repeat and I cannot get him out of there. Especially not after making out with him last night. That was... incredible.

I get up and wander around the room. Take a closer look at the scale model McLaren and it is pretty accurate from what I can tell. I thumb through books and honestly... I don't recognise any of them. I'm not really a big reader. I open the wardrobe and let my hand brush along all his shirts and jackets. Then to the desk. There's a snow globe on the side, acting as a paperweight. I pick it up and swirl it. It makes it look like Disneyland is swarmed with snow and I smile at the thought. I look down at the first piece of paper that was on the pile beneath it - a poem judging by the format:

'Dry, fissured earth of

these lips

beneath the solar caress

of his thumb.

Burn the map of my body

with your touch;

Make me kindling,

crack and splinter of wood

in the moan

you conjure

from my throat.

Set fire to my senses

and leave me with nothing

but smoke.'

I... don't know much about poetry. I don't write it and I rarely read it so it is not an artform I can really judge with any merit. Hell, I still thought poetry had to be all rhyming couplets and jaunty rhythms but there is something about that piece. Something sultry and intimate and... sexy. I can actually feel my cheeks flushing, my mind flashing with images; My thumb running along Ali's lips. Our bodies pressing together. My mouth at his neck... yep, it is certainly having an effect. And an embarrassing one too. Which gets compounded when I hear a voice behind me.

"Like what you're reading?"

I turn, rather sheepishly, to see Ali and my eyes go wide and my jaw barely avoids scraping the floor. He is leaning against the door, towel wrapped around his waist, still pretty much soaking wet and his hair slicked back... and I can feel his deep, tourmaline eyes looking at me. I don't know if what he does next is a conscious thing or not but he licks and then bites his lip before smiling and I just about die.

"Uhh..." is about all I can manage to eke out as Ali strides into the room. He looks amazing. And his eyes haven't left me since he caught me reading his work. He stops about a foot from me and it feels way too close considering he is only covered by a towel right now.

"There's a fresh towel in the bathroom if you wanna go shower."

It takes longer than it really should to register what he is saying but when I do, I just nod and awkwardly try to slip past him, one hand covering my crotch. I grab my bag and all but sprint to the bathroom. I swear I hear him chuckle as I leave. Fortunately he left the bathroom door open and I lock it behind me before falling back against it.

I. Am. Hopeless.

I strip off, lean in and start the water running cold before launching myself under the relentless beating torrent. The shock of it is exactly what I need right now. Something centring and sobering. And it helps with the other problem for certain. I get myself sorted pretty quickly and switch the shower off, drying as best I can and changing into boxers and my jeans at least before heading back to Ali's room.

As I go to leave I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and stop. I'm not unfit. Thanks to boxing and rugby in school, I stayed in pretty good shape. But I know I am putting on weight at the same time. Which I don't mind. I've always been a little more bulky than other people and it suits me I think... yet here I am looking at myself in the mirror and wondering what the hell Ali even sees that's so attractive. Discounting my weirdly coloured eyes and my hair which is a long, wavy mess currently... there isn't exactly much to write home about that I can see.

I sigh and head out the door, back towards Ali's room and I silently pray that he has actually gotten dressed and isn't gonna try and torment me again.