Table For Two

26 - Harvey

It's just after eleven when I get to the restaurant and I let Ali lead me to the table and part of me wishes he was able to just sit with me and we could have food together and talk about stuff. Not even anything important or the fact I kissed him as I left last night. Just do our usual "comfortable silence interspersed with occasional banter and jokes that only make sense to us" routine. But he has to work and honestly maybe me trying to do my essay here isn't going to work because I know that I'm going to find every opportunity I can to stare at Ali because... well, because I can and I think he is cute and I want to look at him. And of course every time I catch a glimpse of him, I think about kissing him. And more besides.

A lot more besides.

I am the most cringeworthy person on the planet, I swear.

I smile at the fact I don't need to order either. The burgers here are great and Ali just puts my order in and brings me a Pepsi. He seems to make a point of letting his fingers briefly trace over my hand as he moves away and I'm pretty sure part of my brain just stops working when he does. How one person can have that much of an effect on me from just... existing is bitterly unfair. I watch him move away to serve a family of four that just walked and immediately notice how fitted his trousers are. If I blushed any brighter at the fact I am openly gawking at Ali's ass, I'd outshine the sun.

I do everything I can to focus on my work as I go over my notes and rewatch the clip I was analysing from Silence Of The Lambs. I focus on the lighting in Lecter's cell. On each sound and everything right down to the intense focus on close up face shots during dialogue. I make notes on how it shows power dynamics, a student and teacher in a sense. I know I am rambling but thankfully this is just a first draft and I can refine it later when I don't have a really cute guy striding about in full view of where I am sitting. Ali brings my food over after a little while.

"Sorry about the wait. One of the kitchen guys has the 'Rona so we're running a bit behind" he says apologetically. I look up and see he is wound a little tight. The other server and Dee also look stressed. I reach out and, as discreetly as possible, squeeze his hand. He squeezes back and I see him take a shaky breath.

"Anything I can do to help?" I ask. It sounds ridiculous the moment I say it but hell if seeing Ali smile a little makes it worth saying. He looks at me before pulling the façade back down and I can see there is something wrong.

"I know it'll be a long day... but would you be able to stay until I finish? If the evening is quiet I might see if I can shoot early and make it up later." he says all this without letting go of my hand. Almost like he is pleading more than asking. And me being me, I can't help but feel for him.

"Yeah. Gives me more time to work on this." I say with a smile and gesture to the clip that keeps repeating and is currently zoomed in on Lecter's face which is mildly disconcerting. Ali returns the smile, looking like he's trying not to cry. He mouths thank you and goes back to serving and I swear to god I want to just reach out and pull him into a hug. Just try and make him feel better because something is clearly not right. I try to focus on my work but I'm keeping one weather eye on Ali as he moves around the restaurant.

We've only known each other a short amount of time but I think we've been around each other enough to notice things now. Usually, Ali is fairly laid back and, even though he can get wound up at work, it usually doesn't look like this. Everything right now is forced. His shoulders are up and tight. The smile is matched with a manic look in his eyes where they're usually so serene and caring. He's also constantly scratching at his wrists and neck like he's overheating. I get up and go to the bar and guess this is Dee.

"Hey... Dee, right?"

"Yessir. Ohh you're Harvey, huh?"

"Uh... yeah"

"If you need anything, I'll come over and grab an order off you. The boss doesn't really like dining guests to be walking up to the bar and ordering but fortunately he's tied up in the kitchen right now."

"Oh... yeah no I was just... is Ali okay?"

"Hmm?"

I gesture over to where he is taking an order and she looks for all of three seconds before giving me an answer.

"He gets a little pent up sometimes. Should be fine but thanks for bringing it up. He'll probably outlive God before he actually tells most people he isn't 100%. He did tell me he was feeling a little... 'spread thin' I think is how he put it but try getting any more than that out of him? I'd have better odds winning the lottery" she shrugs.

"Can I ask what's up with him?"

"You can. But I'm not answering. That's for him to tell you. Not me. I ain't saying shit" she says definitively before grabbing a ticket from the other server and turning back to make some cocktails because apparently mid-afternoon is now cocktail hour. I will never understand drinking. At all. But watching Dee work is like watching performance art. Kinda shows why the place is popular for people who like drinking; Dee is a master at what she does.

I go and sit back down, ostensibly to keep working on my essay but now I'm just sitting here keeping an eye on Ali. At some point he disappears out back and so does Dee as the bar cover comes in. I see him put a cigarette between his lips as they go. It's something I noticed about him before - that faint lingering scent of smoke. But... I kinda find it hot? I probably shouldn't. But then I just picture him in a black leather jacket and ripped jeans and riding a motorbike like he's James Dean and my brain goes into a full nuclear meltdown.

I need to stop just thinking about Ali like this. It's not only cringeworthy but it makes me glad I wear oversized shirts. They hide a lot.

In fairness, Ali disappearing for a little bit lets me get on with doing some work and start to focus properly. I manage to get a decent first draft done and start editing my opening so it actually sounds coherent and intelligent rather than a rushed mess. I don't even notice time passing. At some point my plate got cleared and a fresh Pepsi was placed beside me which I started drinking without really looking at where it came from. I get like this when I get lasered in on something. Before I even know it, Ali appears at the table and seems to be waiting on me.

"Oh hey. Are you done already?" I ask, blissfully unaware of the time.

"Yeah. I'm done." he says a little sharply. I leave it alone and go to pay. Dee gives me a nod when I go back to the table and pack up so we can leave.

The moment we're outside, he grabs my arm. As I turn to him, he ploughs into me with a hug. I instinctively hug him back and feel him kind of pull tighter to me. I don't really have anything else I can do. I just hold him and hope it makes him feel better.