Heartbreaker

N I N E T E E N

The next four months flew by.

And Paul and I were closer than ever.

It was strikingly fast, how easily I had let him in once I allowed myself to. Trust was something I seemed to not even question when thinking about Paul. At this point, I just knew that he would have my back.

And slowly opening myself up to him seems to work out. He's been a really good friend.

There definitely are some sort of feelings that are there. At least I know I have them. And he told me he liked me before. But, and I might sound like I have a lot of baggage, I wasn't ready just yet.

It's probably frustrating from his point of view. I wouldn't blame him if he just decided to move on, and find some other girl that would easily allow him in.

But that's not me. I don't trust easily, but when people stick around long enough, I love hard. I just have a think layer to get through in the beginning.

I realized over these past couple of months that Paul was hiding something. All of them were. The more time I spent with Paul and his friends, the more I realized how secretive they all were. Someone somehow would slip up and it would be followed by a bad joke.

Why couldn't Paul just tell me the truth?

I thought at first it was because I hadn't told him anything. But then I realized that isn't the type of person he is. Paul might try to bite others heads off if they rub him the wrong way, but he was always kind to me.

"Hey," Emily says, knocking me out of my thoughts. "You okay?"

"Yeah," I smile at her, "Just, deep in thought."

We were at her house. I always felt cozy, and at home here. She always welcomed me in with open arms.

She hums, "Do you mind helping me with dinner?"

"Yeah," I smile, standing from the wooden chair in the middle of her kitchen. Not only have Paul and I gotten close, but Emily, Kim, and I have grown close as well.

I loved Jaeda and Eden, they'll always be my best friends. But it was nice how warm they were when it came to allowing me into their close-knit group.

"What are you making?" I ask, "Smells like garlic bread."

"Yes, and fettuccini," She smiles, "It's my grandmother's recipe."

"It smells really good," I tell her, and she sets down a tub of lettuce in front of me. She doesn't have to tell me what to do, I know she wanted me to start making the side salad.

"Do you cook?" She asks, adding some cream to the white alfredo sauce.

"Here and there," I tell her, "I help my dad. But it's nothing crazy, it's, tacos, or spaghetti. Something simple."

"I'm sure it tastes great," She says kindly.

"When I don't burn it, yes," I joke, smiling over at her. Emily is someone that I didn't expect to meet, but I'm happy I did. She is the most caring, compassionate person I've ever met. She lets the boys come over whenever they want, at any hour of the night. It's like they were their own type of family.

"Do you know where the boys are?" I ask, "Not that I'm not happy to be hanging out with you." When I arrived here after school, it was only Emily. Even though Paul texted me to come here.

She smiles, "I'm not sure where they went. But they'll be back soon."

I nod, continuing to chop up the large pieces of lettuce. She puts a bag of carrots, a tomato, and a cucumber in front of me.