You Can Only Love Someone So Far//Avenged Sevenfold •M.Shadows•

I'm Lost

(This one's long, my bad)

We were all still standing in the hallway. At the moment, I didn't care about Brian and I breaking up, all the shit he did, me breaking my sobriety, or Matt and I accidentally getting married.

I believed I was genuinely okay for once. I smiled. "We should do something fun together. And no fighting or arguing or any of that shit." I said. Lacey and Gena agreed.

"I don't know, what we should we do?" Johnny asked.

No one said anything, they didn't have any ideas, we just stood there, that is until Zacky said something. "I wanna see you play guitar." He said. "You play guitar?" Lacey asked. I nodded. "...and bass." I really didn't want to play. I haven't played since my dad died.

There was a brief period in my life where I stopped playing for a few months after my mom died, but my dad encouraged me to keep going. And when he died, I was lost.

"Are you okay with playing?" Johnny asked. I sighed. It's almost been 2 years since my dad died, and it's nearly been about 9 years since I lost my mom.

I put on a smile. "Fuck it." I said. I didn't even know if I remembered how to play. I started playing young given the fact my mom was a music teacher. I hoped it was all muscle memory and that I'd remember.

Zacky and Johnny got really excited and started running down the hallway. "Your guys' beloved's are fucking strange." I told Lacey and Gena. They both laughed. "Trust me, we know." Gena said.

They started running after them. I then watched as Jimmy put an arm over Matt's shoulders and they starting walking and talking. Leaving Gates and I. Now, if these were normal circumstances, I'd either walk away, say some bitchy comment, or roll my eyes, but things were okay right now.

Syn stopped walking and I felt him grab my hand, making me stop walking too. 'What was he doing?' I thought to myself. I turned around to face him. "Delilah." He said softly. This was a different Brian from the one that argued with me this morning.

"Yeah?" I questioned, confused. "Look, I need to say something and I know you probably don't want to listen to any of the shit I have to say, especially after how I treated you, but please listen anyway." He stated calmly.

He actually said it seriously. He was taking this very seriously which made me know how much this conversation probably meant to him.

I smiled a small smile at him. "I'm listening, Bri." I assured him. He smiled too and gave my hand a small squeeze. "I shouldn't have treated you the way I did. And I'm sorry. I was stupid and mistakes were made. I think the both of us know that this should have ended the day it happened. On that stupid fucking bathroom floor." He explained.

I didn't say anything, I let him continue. It seemed like he had a lot to get off of his chest. "I know you probably don't want to hear how fucking sorry I am, but I am sorry. I shouldn't have asked for this to be a relationship. I don't have a good track record with those. I'm also sorry for being the reason you broke your sobriety. And I'll continue to say I'm sorry for everything that I've done, or will do in the future, because your my friend. I understand you probably hate me and never want to be friends again, but in the end that's what you are to me. I'm also sorry for how I treated you and Matt and this morning, that was really shitty of me." He continued.

I waited a few minutes to see if he was done talking and he was. I smiled again. "Brian, I will admit, that you've done some pretty shitty things to me, but I told you last night that I believe friendship has a funny way of being there for when you need it. And it looks like you need it. Besides, you did something that none of my exes never did do." I told him in all honesty.