let the light in | jack hughes

Chapter 74

[March 28, 2024]

Jack

We're playing the Canadians today, and I'm hoping to be able to sneak away with Beatrice to introduce her to Cole and show her my favorite restaurant in Montreal. The last time we were in Montreal I was in a bad mood and I hooked up with a random blonde girl I met at a bar. I remember how worn out and tired Bea looked going into her room and I felt a tinge of guilt but brushed it off. 

I pack my bag, making sure everyone I need is in my suitcase. Meds? Check. Journal? Check? I call out for Luke, making sure he's ready to leave. He yells that he's ready, and tells me his girlfriend, Marie is good to stop by later to feed Bruce. We leave the house, hiding the key under our doormat, and drive to where our plane is. 

jack

miss you, feel like I haven't seen you in forever

I send Bea a quick message, sitting in the front like she usually does, waiting for her to get on. Nico trots on, tiredly, rubbing his eyes, dropping into the seat in front of me. He puts on his sunglasses and neck pillow, ready to fall asleep. I nudge him gently before he falls asleep, asking if he knows where Bea is. "No, but she should be here soon," he says, closing his eyes and drifting off. 

Haula overhears me asking Nico about Beatrice and starts grinning like the town idiot. "What?" I ask, balling my hands up into fists. "Nothing, you just like her, you care a lot. I thought you just thought she was cute, but you actually like her," he says in a whisper, being considerate enough to not shout it to all the guys on the plane. "Love, I love her," I correct him making him hoot and shake me by my shoulders. 

Coach gets on the plane and gives the pilot the all-clear, telling him everyone is on the plane. I look around as the plane starts taking off, wondering why Beatrice isn't here or responding to my messages. I bounce my knee, my jitters getting the best of me. Is she ghosting me? Was our date not fun? Did she lie? Is she busy with someone else right now? I ask all at once, breaking into a sweat from how anxious I feel. 

I put some headphones in, wanting to drown out everything that I'm feeling. I close my eyes listening to the sound of Harry Styles' voice in his song 'Little Freak' I dig my nails into the palms of my hands needing something to ground myself, but for now, I let my brain do its worst and rip me apart piece by piece. 

jack

just landed in Montreal, where are you?

I miss you 

We take a bus to the hotel, settling down for a bit before the game tonight. Around 5 p.m. after grabbing some lunch, which I could barely keep down because of how nauseous I feel we head down to the rink. I run through the worst pregame ritual of my life, having to stop every few minutes to control my breathing. Nico notices and puts a reassuring hand on my shoulder, "Bea is okay," he says and I stand up, wondering how he knows that. 

"D-did she tell you that?" I look down at my phone noticing that she still hasn't texted me. "No, but I'm sure she is okay. I haven't heard from her and neither has Devon," he says, making my heart sink. I nod my head, putting the rest of my pads on before I head out onto the ice. We walk out together and the gentle reminder that someone is photographing me isn't there, making me more on edge than I need to be. 

After stretching, and the anthem I get ready for a face-off, standing by Nico ready for whatever happens. My brain wanders as Nico takes the puck, passing it to me, but it slips past me leading me to race against the opposing team to get it. Luckily, I got it in time and passed it to Dawson. The refs blow the whistle giving Nico time to bump into me. "Come on Jack, get your head in the game." he pats my back with the end of his stick. I nod my head in understanding.