Better This Way

Forty

"Thank you so much for today" Kimmy said as we walk to the parking lot.

I smiled at her and took my car key out. I am trying all my best not to show that I am not okay. When I saw Freen today, everything in me was pushing me to run into her arms. What did she do that the security personnels were looking for her? Now I am curious to know whether she escaped or not.

"Are you really okay?" Kimmy asked taking me out of my thoughts.

"Yes I am" I responded.

She cupped my cheeks and caressed them. Looking at me in the eyes while smiling. Why is she acting like this making me uncomfortable? We were not even close before that thing happened between us and we still are not close. So why is she being all touchy?

"Uhm. I have to go now" I said and moved away from her.

"Sure" she simply said.

"Call me when you get home" she said and I nodded.

She started walking to the other direction. Maybe that's where she parked her car while I walked to mine. I was about to open my car door when I sensed that someone was standing behind me. I quickly turned and I was right. Someone was actually behind me.

I screamed in fear and threw my purse at the person while covering my face with my palms.

"Ouch!" The person exclaimed.

That voice sounded familiar. I gently opened my eyes to see who that was.

"I am sorry I didn't mean to startle you" she said as she tried walking close to me.

But she suddenly stopped and I don't know why. Freen handed my purse to me while looking at me in the eyes. My heart is beating fast. Was she waiting for me all these while? I thought she already left.

"Thank you for saving me earlier" She added.

"I didn't save you. The security personnels were stupid enough to let you escape" I said and she nodded in agreement.

There was an awkward silence for some minutes. I am so nervous right now because I wasn't expecting to see her at all. I am so nervous like a teenager who just ran into her crush. We remained silent until she...

"My dad told me that you visited."

"I wanted to find out the truth myself since I don't trust you nor any other person. So yeah. Nothing much in visiting him"

"And the truth? Were you able to..."

"I am still researching about it" I cut her off.

Well I lied. I know the truth now. But I am still mad at her therefore, I won't admit it. Gosh I feel so awkward right now because I badly want to be in her arms but I can't because my ego is getting on the way.

"Becky I know you hate me now and I can understand that but I am sorry. I am sorry for everything that has happened." She said.

"Is that why you're here?" I asked nonchalantly.

I know I am trying to act strong but the truth is that I am not. I no longer hate her. Being happy that she is here right now with me proves that I don't hate her anymore.

"I want you to know that I regret everything. I regret ever hurting you. And I hope someday in the future when everything is over, and we move on with our lives, you can be able to think of me and smile and not hate me forever." she continued.

My heart shattered into pieces when I heard her say that. This is obviously a goodbye message. It's actually over between us. I was living in denial all these while but this means it. We hold no future together.