36 Questions to Fall in Love...in 36 days!

Chapter 27: Willow Tree and Dare King

20 November 2023🥀

“Could you just help me God,” I pray from my bed, feeling like I don't even have the strength to get up.

The sun shines through the curtains promising a better day but my heart denies it entirely.

The weekend feels like it flew by in a few seconds and it's like I need it to be Saturday again because Monday involves facing things.

I want to stay in my room and sulk and cry and be mad at myself, at life and everything else but I have a really important exam so I push those feelings aside.

“Help my Grandfather and I pick up all the pieces and just get our life back together. I want to focus on all the good things in my life like my friends and  love and just everyone who's stayed. I need you to pick me back up again.”

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School was boring without Dominique, Oratile or any of the guys I usually talked to so immediately I was done with my exam I left.

I got home and found it empty and for a moment my heart stopped but before I could jump into any crazy conclusions I found a small note from Mkhulu by the kitchen counter that said —Out for a stroll. Don't trash the house.

After changing into a sky blue sweater and sweatpants, I spend the next moments watching T.V while waiting for Olivia's call.

My heart yearns to see her today. It's been a whole two days without seeing her but it's been two days too long.

I check my phone every other minute but still no message or call except for a few memes that Dominique keeps sending me.

What if she doesn't want to see me anymore?

The thought pierces through my mind, making my mood go sour.
Could I have done anything to ruin this…before it actually began.

When the sun starts setting, the negative thoughts dance through my mind like they've been waiting for this moment for a while. I decide to call her but she doesn't answer any of them.

I send texts on WhatsApp but still no response.

I can't lose Olivia...

An overwhelming feeling settles over my heart making it impossible for me to focus on anything but it.

I know where this insecurity is rooted from and it makes me mad. It makes me mad to realize that I'll always be self conscious about the people I love leaving me because of her.

Maybe it's because of my crying, I think to myself, the thought shaming me.

Maybe it's because of how much I'm a walking contradiction, telling her I want to be close and then pushing her away the next moment.

The sun continues to set and I wish I could tell it to go back up because the day can't end like this.

With no word from Olivia. With not even a flicker of love in my life but the sun continues to set, the  blue sky changing to a darker hue.

I overanalyze yesterday's call, wondering if maybe I didn't comfort enough about the problem with her sister. It's been all about me, me, me these past few days so maybe I missed something.

The knock that sounds from the door breaks through my thoughts. At least  Mkhulu is back to keep my mind off all these feelings.

When I pull open the door I'm met with the sight of Olivia…

She's smiling, her coffee brown eyes holding mine with excitement. She's dressed in a knee length sunset pink dress that makes her look like a flower, her black braids pulled loose to flow beautifully over her back.