Boys Will Be Bugs

Chapter 63: Bartender

Remus slept with the light on and music playing softly in the background, a habit he was starting to depend on. Selene didn't protest, and left him to it. She said she'd placed a charm around her room so he didn't have to worry about the music waking her, but he suspected that this wasn't the case at all. She'd commented on the music he chose sometimes, even when she'd been in her room at the time he'd chosen it. Perhaps sometimes she was listening to it as well.

He'd met up with Lazaros again the day after they'd first spoken, and they wandered about the small village that his aunt lived in. Remus loved being able to talk about his experiences with someone who knew exactly what he was talking about. It was unfamiliar, but certainly welcome. He still had a lot of questions for Lazaros, but he tried to reign himself in as much as possible.

"When did you tell your parents?" he asked, when the two were sitting on a bench, licking at ice creams they'd bought from a local ice cream van.

"Only a few years ago. They didn't understand it at all."

"What did they do?"

"Nothing really, I'd already moved out by then so there wasn't anything they could do. They haven't spoken to me since, though."

"Oh. I'm really sorry."

"That's alright, I've moved on. If they're being this stubborn then they're not worth it."

"You really believe that?" Lazaros hesitated.

"Well, that's what I tell myself, anyway." He quickly took the focus off himself. "What about your parents?"

"They're fine. I mean, my dad took some time, but my mum..." Remus trailed off.

"Your mum?" Remus shook his head, a gesture to brush away the conversation.

"She's fine with it, she's really great..." He searched for a way to change the subject, not trusting himself to say anything more without crying.

"I like your tattoos," he settled for. "I wish I had those."

"Yeah, they're cool, aren't they?" said Lazaros, not pushing the subject of Remus's mum any further, noticing that it was clearly a sensitive subject. "Got them done in London."

"I bet my friend would love them."

"This the same friend you were talking about last night?"

"Yeah. His name's Sirius."

"Have you decided on what you're gonna do about him yet?" Remus thought about it. He realised that he wasn't as angry at Sirius as he was a few days ago. The anger had dissipated; it didn't seem worth it in the grand scheme of things. Remus had much bigger problems right now, so being angry at one extra thing was not helping. Besides, Lazaros was right, it was no one's fault. It wasn't really fair of Remus to expect Sirius to be okay with not being straight, regardless of whether this was the case or not, when his family were so awful. Sometimes Remus forgot how lucky he was to have family who accepted him no matter what, and not least of all to have an aunt who was gay as well. Sirius didn't have that. Sirius couldn't even hope to have that.

"I should talk to him," said Remus. "But that means going back to Hogwarts and I'm not sure if I'm ready for that. I like working here, with aunt Selene. It's nice." What use was an education if he was never going to use it? Right now he was experiencing his only chance at an actual career, even if it was just a temporary job as an assistant to his aunt (and not a particularly good one at that). The point was he could become good, learn all the skills he needed to be the best bartender in the entire county, and inherit the bar that he already felt so much at home in.

But he was starting to miss his friends, and he felt bad about giving up Hogwarts after an entire childhood spent thinking that he was never going to get to attend in the first place. His mum would have been at least a little bit disappointed, even if she would never outwardly show it.