With Him | Bucky x Reader | Enemies with Benefits

-88-

Y/n's POV:

No sleep had been achieved, no matter how hard Wanda had tried to get me to at least take a nap - I knew I wouldn't be able to until Bucky got home. He would get home. He had to get home. 

After this mission, I didn't know if I could keep doing this, not knowing if he would be home to me each day, if I would come home to him. How could I leave him to raise our baby girl alone? How could he leave me?  

I paced around the library as Wanda sat on the couch. "Y/n, please. Walking in circles won't get him here any quicker."  

"I don't believe you." I retorted, continuing.  

My feet were killing me, my toes were cold, and everything was bad but if Bucky was hurt then I'd never forgive myself. 

I ran my hands over my belly the small bump giving me the first ounce of reassurance that I'd been able to find all day. 

I gave up on the pacing and collapsed into the softest armchair. 

"Thank you." Sighed Wanda.  

I crossed my legs and sat forward, my hand still resting on my tummy. "What if he's gone, Wanda? I can't lose him again." 

"I'm sure he's okay. He'll be okay."  

I shook my head and sighed. They'd set off the alert. That wasn't in the plan. Something had to be wrong and nobody knew what - or they did and just weren't willing to tell me - because Bucky was... 

I burst into tears (fuck these hormones) yet again and was practically helpless until Wands walked over and joined me, squishing onto the chair next to me and wrapping me in her arms around me. 

I don't even know how long we sat like that, just that I jumped up when I heard the sound of a jet approaching the building and began to run to it. 

I swung open the glass doors and ran onto the landing deck, getting as close as I could (safely of course. Me? Not think things through? Never.)  

It felt like it took forever for them to get out of the jet. Everyone's faces were dejected and Buck hadn't gotten out yet. I didn't want to give up hope yet but it wasn't looking good. 

It was then that I saw him and immediately all the worry flowed out of me. I ran up to him and wrapped him in my arms so forcefully that he had to take a step back. It took a couple of seconds for him to react but eventually, his arms tightened and it felt like he would never let me go. 

Everything stopped. There was no more screaming anxiety in my head, I was just wrapped up in his smell, his feel, the pattern of his breathing, the place my head rested on his chest -  everything.  

when he eventually pulled away, he picked up a little kid who I hadn't noticed had been sitting at the door of the jet, swinging his legs out of boredom. He wrapped his arms around Buck just as tightly as I had and pressed his head into Buck's neck. 

Buck leaned over to kiss me softly and began to explain to my (most likely very confused) face. "He's called Vanya, we picked him up at the base. His mom..." 

"...Didn't make it." I filled in, nodding slowly.  

"Let's go sit down." He said solemnly, grabbing my hand and leading me inside. I didn't miss the limp he was walking with. I'd talk to him about it later, he seemed serious. 

Once we got to the couches inside, we both sat down. Vanya still seemed to hide from me but I wasn't too concerned, hopefully, he'd warm up to me in a bit. 

"Y/n/n." Buck began, holding my hands in his as the child hung off his neck. He looked about six but you can never be sure with kids from HYDRA. "His mom wasn't the only one that didn't make it."  

My breath stopped. I looked back to the jet and my heart sank. Steve. 

I'd been so stupid, I hadn't even considered that he could get hurt, he was Steve. He was like a rock, always there and ready to support. Steve. 

My eyes went back to my man and then to the child in his arms.  

Bucky gave me the perfect look, with just his eyes he tried to tell me that it would be alright, and even if it wasn't, he'd be here for me. But Steve was gone... 

(764 Words)