Sugar Cookie

34

You got up. There was practice today. You sighed, getting out of bed and getting ready for the day. You got into your track suit, looking in the mirror as you fixed your hair into h/s.

You weren't looking forward to seeing the team together. You thought back to your date with Oikawa last night. How were you going to look the guys in the eye, knowing you took a day to forget about them and enjoyed yourself with the person that beat them in their last match?

You walked out of your house, walking straight into Sugawara. Your eyes widened as you looked at the boy. He looked at you, longing in his eyes. He knew what happened yesterday, for the most part. He knew you had a date with Oikawa, that you two had kissed. He didn't know what he could say you in that moment, so he didn't say a word. There was a tense, and uncomfortable silence between you two.

You sigh, breaking the silence. "How are you today, Koushi?"

"Fine. How was your date with Oikawa yesterday?"

"You know we had a date yesterday? How? I didn't say a word about it to anyone. I didn't know how to let the team know that I had plans with him, not after you all lost to Aoba Johsai."

Sugawara sighed. "I saw him go to your house yesterday. I saw you guys leave mid morning, then come back again in the evening. I saw him getting ready to leave at your door. I saw you two kiss. I saw everything, for the most part. Of course I can piece everything together and know what happened."

"I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, I just didn't know how you'd feel about it."

"How I feel about it? You want to know how I feel? I'm hurt, Y/n. You made a bet and we lost. You're in a relationship with someone you didn't want to date because the team lost to Aoba Johsai, because I lost to Oikawa. If it was anyone but him, I might've been ok with you getting into a relationship. It's not ok."

You look at the ground, feeling tears in your eyes. "I understand."

"No, you don't understand, Y/n! You don't know what it's like to have to see someone who've known your whole life, who you grew up with, get with someone you absolutely can't stand! You don't know what it felt like to watch as he kissed you, especially after you kissed me before the match with them!"

A tears broke free from your eye, falling to the ground with the flow of gravity. "How do you think I felt? I have to go on dates with him, be called his girlfriend, let him kiss me. I hate it! I don't like Oikawa that way, and I never will! That kiss with you felt special, the kiss with him felt like nothing!"

Sugawara looked at you, eyes wide. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have raised my voice. I know you're hurting from this more than the rest of us. They were all crushed to hear about the bet. They feel bad, they're all blaming themselves for you having to be in a relationship with Oikawa."

You look up at him, still teary eyed. "It's not any of your faults. I made the bet with Oikawa. You know, I was going to have him bow to you guys and admit that he wasn't as good a setter as you, if he had lost. I was so confident that you all would win, that you would be given the chance to beat him. It crushed me too, when I saw you guys lose."

He leaned over, wrapping his arms around you, causing you both to stop in the middle of the path. "I know you're hurting. You're not dating the person you love. It must be really hard for you, and I don't understand that. I've never gotten into a relationship, because I never loved anyone that confessed to me. I didn't even have my first kiss, until you kissed me that day. I thought I was going to win, I felt like nothing could beat me since you did that. It broke my heart to see us lose, to see the look on your face once we lost against them. We didn't just lose that match, we lost you to Oikawa's grasp. None of us like that idea. That's what hurt so much about losing that match. We lost the most precious person to us, the very person that helped to make this team as strong as it was. We all felt heartbroken at that loss. It wasn't just volleyball, it was the fate of you that we lost."

You let out a sob, leaning your head against his shoulder. "I really wanted you to win, Koushi! I wanted to be able to tell you something I've kept to myself our entire lives! Now, I can't say it because Oikawa has me right where he wanted me this whole time! If I say it, I'll be a horrible person."

"I know you love me, Y/n. You can't kiss me like that without it meaning something."