Narrator POV
„Garcia?" she called after Vicky as she was about to leave.
„Is everything okay with you?" she asked as her student stopped.
„I'm fine." a clear lie she told.
At this point everything Vicky wanted was a hug. Not from her lecture. Not from Olsen. But from Lizzie. She knew she made a mistake. Johansson feels like a mistake and a good thing at the same time.
She realized during training that she maybe shouldn't have entered that car the other night.
Maybe she shouldn't have let her intrusive thoughts take the lead.
She already had enough problems with Olsen and that sex drive. Why did she add Johansson to the plate of disastrous decisions.
Why couldn't she stay low?
„Vicky, don't lie to me." Olsen utters making her feel an ache on hearing how her name slid of her lips.
„I don't think we are doing the right thing."
Vicky breaths out anxiously. Feeling overwhelmed by everything that is rushing through her mind.
„Did something happen that made you think this way? Did someone notice anything? What is it V?"
She asked worried noticing how Garcia is stressed out.
„Please don't call me that."
„What? Call you by your name? V what's going on? I am here to listen tell me what's on your mind it's okay."
„No it's not! I- I don't wanna get you into trouble."
Vicky sighs quietly feeling her words starting to get stuck in her throat.
„Trouble? L- Vicky you won't get me into trouble what makes you think that?" she questioned her lover concerned.
Vicky's mind is falling into a spiral. If Smith knows that she was doing something with Olsen or Johansson it's gonna be the end of her.
All three will lose what they are passionate about and this can't happen at all.
She has to do anything so that Smith won't expose them. Whatever it takes. She can't let him drag her down. Or Olsen or Johansson.
„I fear that we have eyes on us." Vicky confessed even though she wanted to stay silent about it. But looking into those green worried eyes she couldn't stay quiet. She melted away in a moment of vulnerability. Something she hates showing.
„Let's go to my office. We can discuss things there." She comforted Vicky by stroking her shoulders. Taking the shortest way possible to enter Olsen's private office.
„So, why do you fear that someone has eyes on us?Who do I need to get rid off hm?" she asked her devoted to do whatever it takes to take her worry's away.
Just like Vicky will do soon once she gets to Smith.
„I don't know. I just feel watched. It creeps me out. Maybe I am just overthinking as per usual I shouldn't have-."
„No V please. You are doing great with sharing your fear. I noticed you were off today but I didn't want to push you. I don't think you are overthinking. I've never seen you in such discomfort and distress. So this must be something serious." she says while placing her hand on Vicky's thigh. Reminding her of how she touched her not even 24 hours ago.
„I don't know who or why but I just feel like we should stop...this..." she wiggled her finger between them. Giving Olsen the feeling as if she was punched in the gut.
„Are you sure? I don't wanna lose you."
„Did you ever have me to begin with?"
Vicky questioned crucial silencing Olsen.
But this was the truth. Nothing was official.
They are a secret. Even though both can't deny that they feel something by now.
They never addressed what they are.
„I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have, said that, but you know we are nothing."
„Don't say that. We are something Vicky." Olsen utters.
„What exactly? You know I can't commit to a relationship. We are just fucking." Vicky tells her honest.
„It's not just fucking to me." she says making Vicky sigh in frustration. She doesn't know where to continue.
„It is Olsen. Don't lie to yourself."
„So what? You wanna end this?" She asked sounding mad now.
„I don't know okay!!! I mean should we? You wanna keep on doing this?"
„You awfully sound like you don't wanna do this at all!!" she spat back.
„It's confusing me okay! I-I wanna stop doing this because it's wrong and we might get caught!
But fuck when I look at you I just.. you infuriate me. I wanna continue this but I wanna stop at the same time!" she confesses mad.
„Why do you wanna stop? What are so you afraid off Vicky?" she fired back.
„I am afraid off getting hurt! For gods sake I am terrified because you have the power to hurt me!
Because I let my guard down. I get caught up in you when we just fuck."
The room falls into a dreadful silence. All they hear is their own hectic breathing.
„Hurting you is the least thing I'd wanna do. I could never hurt you." she whispered softly as she places her hand on the side off Vicky's face. Stroking away that one tear that Vicky wanted to hide so desperately.
Even though they both confessed things, they still didn't come completely clean. Both of them still have secrets that are hidden behind their masks.
Olsen knows the power she has over Vicky. Yet Vicky wasn't quite sure if she'd have any power over her lecture.
„I can't keep myself away from you. I am to weak for it." Olsen confesses giving Vicky the clarity now that she does have an affect on her as well.
Because who are they both kidding? They can't stay away from one another. If they could they'd be together every second. But they can't.
Somehow it drives them both mad and it brings them even closer that they can't be close together all the time.
„Then don't." Vicky whispered back as they both looked into each others eyes deeply.
...
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Bloodstained love
Fanfiction„I'd say she's a closed up bitch with no filter in front of her mouth" he comments with crossed arms. „No need to disrespect her since she beat you during practice." your professor commented to his reply putting him back into his place where he bel...
