Kellin Quinn Imagines

On The Outside Looking In

You sigh and stare out at the world. In here, you are safe from harm. In here, you could survive. Your best friend owns this coffee shop and she brought you into work this morning. She's running around cleaning, meanwhile you sit at the window, staring out. The coffee shop is closed at the moment, but your best friend is preparing to open at 9am. Its around 8am now.

You haven't been getting out much. You and your best friend used to be in a group of three. You were the three musketeers. Three best friends against the world. The third musketeer was Kellin Quinn. He always hung out with both of you, made you laugh, he was so much fun to be around. He asked you out, and you said yes. You went on several dates, it was perfect. Then he finally asked you to be his girlfriend, once again you said yes. He was your best friend and your boyfriend at the time. Things were amazing, for about three months. Then it all turned to shit. He kept finding excuses not to spend time with you, saying he had songs to write. You didn't mind, but your female best friend did. She marched right up to his front door one day, when he'd said he was out all day with the guys, and knocked on the door. He answered wearing only pants. He lied. He had been lying for weeks. It broke your heart, to know that he had to make up excuses so he didn't have to hang with you. You forgave him, let him have another chance. But it was like walking on egg shells after that and things soon ended. He didn't cheat or insult you, he was just cold and distant all the time. But you never wanted it to end, you cried all the time, hoping he'd come back to you. He never did. He broke up with you just over a month ago. And you haven't spoken since.

Your best friend is still mad at him, probably always will be. But you're just depressed. Not angry. Just depressed. You miss one of your best friends. The way he'd move the hair that fell into his mouth when he hasn't cut it in a while. The way that when you and your female best friend forced him out to watch movies, he'd wear dark sunglasses and fall asleep, and you'd act like you didn't notice so your female best friend didn't shout at him. The way he cringed adorably whenever your female best friend shouted at him, and you'd always step in and defend him. The way his eyes affected you. The way HE affected you. You miss everything about him, and there's nothing you can do about it.

Another sigh breaks through your lips, fogging up your side of the glass shop window. The other side is already foggy because its a cold morning, now your side matches. You keep staring out, losing yourself in day dreams about the past.

Your female best friend has been the only one there for you while Kellin has been gone. She's been helping you through this depression, but you haven't come out of the woods yet. She walks over to you, holding a mug, smiles warmly and puts the mug in front of you. Hot chocolate with mini marshmallows, your favourite.
"Thanks wifoo!" You smile up at her from your seat.
She laughs and winks at you "You're welcome wifoo!" Then she goes back to cleaning and preparing. You sip your hot chocolate. Mmm, its not too milky, a little too chocolatey for most people, just the way you like it. You place the mug down on the table and wrap your hands around it, keeping them warm.

There's a light knock on the window coming from the outside. "Sorry she's clo-" You say loudly as you turn to see who it is. Your jaw drops. "K-Kellin!?!"
You don't want to admit it, but he looks pretty awful. His hair's messed up, his eyes are red and puffy with grey bags underneath them and he hasn't shaved in a while. He nods at you. He bends down and starts drawing in the fogg on the glass. He draws a broken heart. You draw a question mark. He draws a plain heart with a question mark beside it, you turn it into a broken heart and sniffle, he nods. He tries his best to write the words "MISS U" backwards, so that you can read it. You smile slightly and write "MISS U 2" and he smiles back at you. He writes "CRYING ALL THE" and he draws a clock beside it, representing time. He's admitting he's been crying all the time. You gasp and write "SAME" and he nods again. He starts writing out once more. This time he writes "NEED TO TALK" and you simply nod. He stands up and makes his way to the entrance of the coffee shop, which is now open because its 9am. As soon  he steps inside your female best friend smiles with her back to him.
"Good morning how can I-" she sees him and rage fills her eyes. She marches around the counter. "What THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE!?!?" She shrieks "YOU BROKE HER HEART!!! YOU RUINED HER!!! DONT THINK THAT YOU CAN JUST WALK IN HERE AND ACT LIKE EVERYTHING'S FINE!!! I'VE BEEN HELPING HER ALL THIS TIME THROUGH THE DEPRESSION CAUSED BY YOU!!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH YOU HURT HER!?!? YOU FUCKING-" She continues shouting at him. He shoves his hands in his pockets and looks down at the floor. Gulping nervously and cringing. He hates this. He knows how much he's hurt you, and she's making it worse. You jump up from your table and run over to him, you stand in front of him, between him and your female best friend. Sure, you down tower her or Kellin, so you aren't much of a shield, but its the thought that counts. Your best friend looks down at you.
You clear your throat "Wifoo, calm down, alright? He knows how much he's hurt me, I dong want him to feel any worse, ok? So can you please go back behind the desk and start baking some cakes while me and him talk? Please wifoo, you know I've got things to say to him."
She sighs "Fine, as its you, but if it was for anyone else or you hadn't been here, you'd be in even deeper shit Bostwick." She spits before marching angrily back behind the desk.
You sigh with relief and turn to look up at Kellin, whose eyes are filled with tears. "Thank you." He whispers huskily.
You smile slightly "Don't mention it. I wont ask if you want a drink, because if she makes you one it'll probably be poisoned, so, take a seat!" You signal to where you were previously sitting, Kellin laughs slightly and follows you as you sit down, he sits opposite you.
He instantly turns deadly serious "(Y/N) I've missed you more than anything in the universe. I can't live without you. I know I fucked up, big time, but I'm here to fix that. I miss your beautiful smile and your adorable giggle, I miss you defending me whenever she shouts at me, I miss how happy you used to make me. When you were mine, I took those things for granted, I didn't realise they are the things keeping me alive and making me smile everyday. But now I don't have them, I've realised. I know its too late, and I hate myself for not realising sooner, but I had to tell you that I have changed. I've been beating myself up constantly, regretting every second of the times I wasn't by your side. And I know I was shitty boyfriend, and I'm sorry for that. You have no idea what it feels like to lose the one you love, to regret everything you did wrong so bad that you hate yourself." He looks down at the table.
You nod and sniffle "Actually, I know exactly what that feels like. I miss you too Kellin. I can't live without you either, but you put us in this situation. You broke up with me, remember? Yes, you did fuck up big time, and I'm glad you've come to your senses.  I hate myself too. I thought I'd done something wrong. Something so wrong you felt the need to be cold and distance. Something so wrong that you didn't want to hang out with me anymore. I felt like complete shit Kellin. No matter how hard I looked, I couldn't find what I'd done wrong. You were only a shitty boyfriend for those last few weeks, before that you were perfect. I hate myself. I'm ruined. The one I loved left me, you don't know what that's like seeing as you left me. You didn't lose me Kellin, you pushed me away, its your own fault. And both of us have clearly paid the price for that."
Kellin nods and his gaze locks with yours "I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you. I'm sorry for being cold and distant. Im sorry for making up excuses, that was such a dick move. You never did anything wrong, it was all me. Please, don't take this out on yourself!"
You shake your head and look out the window "Too late. Was there even any point in us talking? We aren't getting anywhere! We're just apologising over and over again and setting the other straight, and what's that going to accomplish!?! I'm too depressed right now Kellin, its not the time. Just go, leave, move on!"
He sniffles "Do you hear yourself!?! I've been looking for you since the day after I broke up with you, the worst day of my life, and only today when I was considering giving up did I see you in this window, my day instantly got better! The thought of you, that I could finally see you, hear your voice, speak to you, tell you how sorry I am, it was all I ever wanted! I came in here and your best friend started shouting at me, you know how much I hate that, so you defended me! She called me Bostwick! And you won't even listen to what I have to say!?! Fine!" He cries.
You turn to look at him, he's physically crying. He's wiping away the tears with his sleeve. The sight breaks your heart.
"Kellin...please don't cry!" You beg.
He looks at you "Why not!?! I can't live without you and you won't even listen to me!"
"I've been listening to you this entire time Kellin, clinging to your every word." You say as you stand up and sit beside him. He looks down at you with a shocked expression, you just smile up at him. More tears fall from his eyes, but you wipe them away with your hand. You wrap an arm around him and he curls into you, sobbing into your sweater.
"I'm so sorry (Y/N)!" He repeats the words over and over, proving how sorry he really is. You finally see how much this has hurt him, its hurt him as much as it has hurt you. He's in so much pain, as are you. He needs you, as you need him.
"Shhh Kels, its alright, I forgive you, shhhhh." You comfort him, rubbing circles in his back.
His head suddenly snaps up to look into your eyes "Y-You forgive me!?!"
You nod and smile at him "Yes."
He gasps "W-Will you take me back!?!"
You giggle and nod again "Yes!"
Kellin smiles wider than you've ever seen him smile before as he pulls you into his arms. "I love you so much (Y/N)." He says into your hair.
You smile in the crook of his neck "I love you so much too Kellin, now c'mon, there's one more thing we gotta do!" You wriggle free of his grasp and stand up, holding your hand out. Kellin raises an eyebrow but takes your hand anyway, you pull him to the front desk, where your best friend sits patiently. "Wifoo." You say calmly.
She looks at you and smiles "Yes wifoo?"
"I would like you to apologise to Kellin for calling him Bostwick." You state.
She raises an eyebrow "Why are you defending hi-" she notices you're holding hands. "Why are you holding ha-" she gasps "You're back together!?!"
You nod "Yes. So if you wouldn't mind apologising to my BOYFRIEND, it'd be much appreciated."
Kellin squeezes your hand when you call him your boyfriend. Your best friend sighs and rolls her eyes "Fine!" She looks at Kellin "Sorry."
You roll your eyes "With FEELING!!!"
Your friend sighs again "FINE!!! Look dude, I'm sorry for calling you Bostwick, that was out of order and I shouldn't have, sorry."
Kellin smiles "Its cool, thanks for showing the decency to apologise even though you hate me."
She holds up a finger "I don't hate you. I don't particularly like you after you ruined my best friend, but as she's forgiven you I guess I will have to as well, it may take some time though."
You squeal "So the three musketeers are gonna reunite!?!"
Kellin and your best friend laugh. "Guess so!" Then a customer walks in.
"See ya in a bit wifoo!" You call as Kellin pulls you out the door, she waves at you and sees to her customer. Kellin takes you behind the coffee shop and pushes you up against the wall. You smile up at him. "Well hey there Kels!"
He laughs "Hey there (Y/N)!"
You giggle "Couldn't help but notice you seemed rather happy when I called you my boyfriend..."
Kellin smiles widely "Of course I did!"
You punch him playfully "You soppy mo fucker!"
Kellin laughs "Ah, but you love me anyway!"
You smile "That I do Mr Quinn!"
He buries his face in your hair "Its been so long since I've heard you say those words to me, too long." He whispers.
You giggle "Well, guess what!?!"
Kellin pulls away and raises an eyebrow "What?"
You lock your fingers in his gorgeous head of hair and bite your lip. "I love you!" You peck his lips lightly. "I love you!" You peck his lips again "I love you!" You kiss him one last time.
Kellin smiles adorably, making his eyes crinkle and your heart melt. He wraps his arms around your waist "Well, guess what!?!"
You giggle "What!?!"
He laughs "I love you too!" He pecks your lips. "I love you too!" He kisses you again "I love you too!" He kisses you passionately, catching you off guard. And, just like that, everything's perfect.