THE COP AND THE POP STAR

CHAPTER 34: FIREWORKS

Tom's point of view:

I don't know what is wrong with me. But right at this moment, I feel like I'm a boy, and am so nervous, that I feel like I could puke. My heart is racing, and I don't feel so good.

And it's so awkward right now. Alyssa has gone quiet. She's just looking down at her food, or looking around, she's looking anywhere but at me.

I know I should say something, make her feel better, but I can't form words, I've tried, and nothing comes out. 

She's so beautiful, I get lost just staring at her.

How does she not know she's beautiful? How does she not know what she is doing to me?

She's driving me insane, and I don't think she has a clue.

Jordan said to kiss her, when we dance, and since then Alyssa has gotten tense, and quiet. 

She's nervous, but I think I'm more nervous than her.

Why? I'm acting like I'm a boy about to try and kiss a girl for the first time. I wasn't this nervous when I had my first kiss. But the thought of kissing Alyssa, it's getting to me. It's making my body go crazy just imagining it, and I'm trying hard, to not just stare at her beautiful lips.

I feel so much pressure. I can't mess this kiss up. It has to be perfect. It has to be gentle, and not forceful, or hard, but I don't want her to think it's boring, or not like the kiss. I need her to like the kiss. I need her to want to kiss me again, when this case is over. 

Jordan came back, he was on the phone. He said, "hey you guys ready to do that dance."

Alyssa nodded and stood up.

I suddenly feel sick, I pray that I don't get sick on her.  That can't happen.

My hands are sweating, my heart is beating out of my chest.

Jordan laughs. I look at him.

He said, "you okay Hanson."

The look in his eye tells me he knows that I'm not. Great, that is all I need, please Jordan don't tell Alyssa.

Jordan put some music on, and I'm standing there like an idiot. Just staring at her. Smooth Hanson real smooth. Can I embarrass myself any more than I have. No, I shouldn't think like that, because I'm sure the answer is yes. I could miss her mouth, or puke on her.

Jordan said, "Tom, hold out your hand."

I stare at Jordan. I said, "um what?"

He said, "Hold out your hand for Alyssa to take, then pull her to you slowly."

I said, "Right. Yeah. Alyssa are you ready to dance with me?"

She nodded.

She hasn't said more than two words to me for the last half hour.

I hold out my hand. Please Hanson don't mess this up. Or she will never want to go out with me.

I pull her slowly to me.

I can't mess this kiss up. I can't kiss her so eager, that I devour her mouth, and scare the hell out of her. She has a stalker after all. I don't want to come off as obsessed with her. Even though I am.

I said, "Alyssa, if you aren't ready for that practice kiss, it's fine. I know Jordan won't make you do something that you don't want to do."

Oh F---. She's crying. What did I say? I must have upset her.

I said, "hey Alyssa what's wrong?"

I slowly touched her face. I wasn't sure if I should touch her without her approval, but she's crying, and I just want to comfort her, to stop the tears.