This Can't Be The End

Chapter 61

Trigger warning.

---

Jake didn't give me much context, but from what I do know. I know I should be worried, I have never heard my brother that way.

He's never been so worried and scared.

I make it there in five minutes, of course, bypassing a few lights.

But as long as she's fine, I don't care.

I knock on the door and no one answers.

"Ensleey!" I scream nothing, I turn the doorknob surprised it's not locked, I frantically walk in, I scream her name to no answer.

Then my feet go up the stairs two at a time, I have a strange feeling that she is upstairs, "Ensleey!!!"

Still nothing, I finally walked into the bathroom.

The sight...

I can barely breathe from the ringing in my ears, I manage to pick up my phone, and press call at the 911 number already there. He was right.

"She-my-shes on the floor she overdosed-I think, I don't know please-please get here,"

They tell me they are on their way, and I fall to my knees.

There's white foam coming out of Ensleey's mouth, I press on her stomach, desperate for the foam or whatever the hell is there to go away.

"Ensleey please," I cry, and push at her chest, "Im sorry-please I need you, this can't be the end,"

I sob even louder, looking at her blank stare, the one barely weeks ago was looking at me with so much love.

"NO! Please, no, this can't be the end,"

Finally, they arrive and they take my girl away on a stretcher.

"You can come with us if you'd like," A man says as I nod motionless.

I don't know how I got into the ambulance, I don't know what is happening all I know for sure is that Enlseey's hand is getting colder by the minute, that I might lose her.

I might lose her, this can't be it, this can't be the end of it, it can't.

We made it to the hospital in a matter of minutes which felt like hours, a nurse forced me away, and I begged her to let me stay by her side, but it was no use.

I watched as my angel's pale hand fell limply to her side as I let it go.

The ringing of my cell phone is what pulls me out of the daze I found myself in.

"What happened?" Jake asks, "Is she okay?"

"I don't know," I answer with the only truth I have.

"I'll be there soon-"

"You knew this would happen. Didn't you?"

"Ryv-"

"No, you knew this was a possibility, but you let me fall in love with her."

The realization hit me fast, I might never be able to say those words to her.

"She was better, everything was better,"

"Just get here. Okay?"

I don't give him a chance to answer before hanging up

~*~*~*~

J a k e s    P O V

I think deep down I knew her desperate need to be gone, wasn't gone, that it was still there waiting for a perfect time to reappear.

Ensleey Hendrix, is not someone I expected to be friends with, but she was my own saviour when I couldn't even tell my family that my soulmate was still alive but as someone new. I tried, time and time again, in the end, I found it easier to lie, and pretend we broke up.

I didn't really want anyone to know, but for some reason I found myself spilling my guts out to a high as fuck sixteen-year-old, who was sitting in my living room with red-rimmed eyes, and bruises on her arms.

I didn't regret it, probably because she passed out, about halfway through that conversation. I helped her get sober, and when her mind wasn't consumed with drugs she should have never tried, she helped me.

No, she wasn't well for long, but it was enough for us to form a fucked up friendship.

Though I thought this time, this time she wouldn't find a reason to die again, of course, I was wrong, though I had never seen her happier than she was with my brother, sadly he couldn't see that she never cheated, who knows what took her back to that state.

I just hope it wasn't as bad as the time before.

Ensleey wasn't answering her phone, sometimes it's because she was fucking someone, which I can't judge her for, all that mattered is that it wasn't drugs, I was still worried, ever since her interaction with Parker she had been on edge.

So I drove to her house, to make sure she wasn't fucking up her three months of sobriety.

She has been doing well, I could see the bags under her eyes starting to go away, and her smile became more real.

Could she not be alright?

I knock on her front door, but nothing.

The door is open, Ens always locks the door when she's out.

"Ens?"

Nothing again.

Up the stairs I went, slowly her loud cries became easier to hear.

"Enlseey!" I was shouting by now.

I walked into her room, to see her with a razor, blood coating her arms, her eyes red, and a needle laid on her side.

"I just want to fucking die!" Her words are so full of emotion.

Her eyes were blank, nothing.

"Ensleey-"

"No, just fucking leave," she sobbed, "why can I still feel him?" She sobbed "I just want him off me!"

I couldn't take it, so I slowly walked out of the room, and dialled 911, hoping she wouldn't do more damage to herself in the minute I had left her room.

She had, I remember so well how blood smeared her small frame, how hopeless she seemed, and the disappointment in her eyes when she woke up alive with an oxygen tank and white bandages.

It was a relief when her hazel eyes fluttered to life, sometimes it's hard to remember things how they played, and other times her crimson-soaked frame doesn't leave my mind.

I thought she was better, I thought she was going to be okay.

I was wrong, and somehow I feel that this time will be worse than the last.