Jade Dragon [Lan Xichen x Reader]

Chapter: 69

Lan Xichen was still as he sat next to his wife, his face was numb as he gazed at the wall of the room.

They were still in Qinghe, as he wanted to be of some help to Nie Huaisang and also because Nie Huaisang asked him to stay here. Nie Mingjue's funeral had just passed a few hours ago and his Uncle and Brother had attended as well, he told them the painful news and said that they would be staying in Qinghe till Wei (Y/n) woke up. His Uncle agreed, being aware of his nephew's pain.

As time passed Lan Xichen grew more and more anxious about how he would break the news to his wife as she woke. How would he tell her that they had lost not only their child but also their older brother when he himself was still having a hard time accepting this?

Jin Guangyao had also come once to see Wei (Y/n) when no one was around, he was relieved to see that she was fine but when later Lan Xichen told him about the child, he felt his heart clench on the pain etched on Lan Xichen's face. He had made a mistake, yes... But it was too late to mend it.

Lan Xichen let out a soft sigh and leaned down resting his head on top of their joined hands. He felt a mixture of emotions, ranging from sadness to guilt and even anger toward himself for not being able to protect his family. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing thoughts. He knew that he had to be strong for his wife, but he didn't know how. He felt lost and helpless, unable to find the right words to comfort her.

As he sat there, lost in his own thoughts, he felt a gentle squeeze on his hand. He quickly composed himself and sat up straight, trying to put on a brave face for her. He didn't want her to see the pain he was feeling.

He looked at her and saw his wife's eyes opening, Wei (Y/n) slowly opened her eyes and looked around the room, her gaze finally settling on Lan Xichen. She smiled weakly at him and he returned it, though it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Xichen, what happened?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper, noticing the look in his eyes. She feared for the worst but didn't even bring into consideration what he was going to tell her. Her eyes were gazing at him with a mix of confusion and slight worry.

"I...I was just worried for you.." He spoke but she furrowed her eyebrows and forced her body into a sitting position. "Xichen.." She said and the male hummed sitting in front of her. She gently cupped his face. "What happened?"

Lan Xichen took a deep breath and tried to find the right words to tell her. He knew it would be painful for both of them, but he also knew that he couldn't keep it from her any longer. But when he started to speak his voice shook with pain.

"A-(Y/n)..." He whispered, placing a hand on top of hers as he tried to find the right words. "Our baby..." he finally said, his voice shaking with emotion, "...We've lost...our child...."

Wei (Y/n) stared at him in disbelief for a moment, hoping that he was playing some cruel joke on her. But when she realized that he was serious, she felt a sudden urge to laugh. It couldn't be real, could it? There was no way it could happen...right?

"That's not funny, Xichen," she said, forcing a small chuckle. "You had me worried there for a moment." Fear gripped her heart as she searched his eyes for a little hint that he was just making a very cruel joke, but she found none.

It was when he pulled her into a hug, she knew that it was no joke. The reality hit her like a ton of bricks, and she sat still for a moment, shakily reaching down to place her hand on her womb, where she could usually feel some energy of her unborn child.

She laughed with tears in her eyes and pulled back holding his hand and placing it on her stomach, "A-Huan...I might be a little worn out due to sleeping.." she forced a sob back, "...You can feel them... right?" Her voice was shaking, pleading for him to tell her otherwise.

Lan Xichen could feel his eyes tearing up as he shakily took his hand back and pulled her into his embrace. "I'm sorry," he whispered, holding her close. "I'm so sorry."

Wei (Y/n) shook her head, tears now streaming down her face as she slowly accepted the reality. "No, no, it's my fault...It's all my fault " she said between sobs as she clenched the front of his robes, "I shouldn't have insisted on coming to Qinghe. If I had stayed in Cloud Recesses, none of this wouldn't have happened."

Lan Xichen shook his head, holding her tighter. "It's not your fault," he said firmly, no matter how much he hurt he would never blame her.

The female shook her head again, not convinced. She spoke, her voice breaking. "I couldn't even protect our child."

Lan Xichen pulled back slightly, cupping her face in his hands. "You did everything you could," he said, his voice gentle but firm. "You took care of yourself, you followed the doctors' instructions, and you did everything right. This was not your fault."

She hugged him again, hiding her face in his chest. "I've let you down...I insisted even when you said it was better to stay in Gusu...I didn't listen and now... our child.." She cried again, and Lan Xichen softly sighed.

"You could never let me down," he said, his voice mellow as he rubbed her back softly. "I love you, Wei (Y/n) and I always will. We'll get through this together."

"I'm so sorry..... It's all my fault. I shouldn't have insisted on coming to Qinghe," she sobbed, repeating it over and over, feeling guilty for what had happened. Lan Xichen held her close, feeling the weight of their loss. He didn't blame her for anything, but he understood her pain and felt it too.

He still had to tell her about Nie Mingjue but with how she was now... He would wait for a little while to tell her. After a while when he felt no movement he lightly pulled back to look at her and sighed when he saw her eyes closed and tear stains on her cheeks.

Xichen gently laid her back down and softly kissed her forehead. He sighed wiping away the tears gently and sat next to his wife again. "I'll be here...my love.." he held her hand giving it a light squeeze.

Huaisang had come to check on them but he had been standing outside and listening to both of them. He decided not to disturb them as he walked away.

"We both have lost something very important... haven't we Wei (Y/n)?" he hummed as he went back to his room, maybe...she would be the perfect one. They could both take revenge on the person who caused them pain...