Belladonna | 18 +

Thirty seven | Office arguments & close calls

"I wanted to explain why I've been...distant these last few days," I said mustering up all the courage and confidence I could. "I guess."

Kira didn't say anything. She just looked up at me with no emotion on her face at all. "Talk." She said flatly.

"Okay..." I sighed. "I know it sucks that I pulled away but I have my reason." I started. "I listened to people who thought they knew better and I guess I let that get to me." I said.

I stopped. I was waiting for something from her, it didn't have to be much but just an acknowledgement that she was actually listening to me and knew that I didn't want it to get this far.

"Okay." She said flatly.

"I know I shouldn't have but I listened to people and that got me all in my head about a bunch of things and I thought I had to find a way to get over you." I spoke.

"Alright." She said. Once again like she had no emotion in her tone.

I needed to say more to maybe get like out of her. Her lack of talking back was frustrating in more ways than one.

I sighed. "I thought Lucy would be the best way because she was the easiest option at the time for me. Not that it felt good, but in the moment, I thought she was the easier option."

She sighed. "Easier option compared to what?" She asked.

I know I shouldn't have but her finally saying something more than one word made me excited, I felt like I was going somewhere with it at least.

"Compared to letting my feelings for you develop even more." I said softly.

It felt somewhat good to finally tell her at least. Now she knew and I could have less of a weight on my shoulders.

But I never expected her to scoff. After I finished talking she scoffed—and loudly. I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Is that it?" She asked flatly.

"What?" I asked her.

"Is that really all you have to say?" She asked me in a slight annoyed tone, why was she annoyed.

If anything I should get to be annoyed because I'd just explained to her and she'd brushed it aside. My explanation has to at least count for something.

I know what I did the last couple of days has been shitty but coming to explain it all should be enough to get something more out of her.

"I've literally just explained my disappearance to you and that's all you have to ask?" I asked her annoyed.

"Yes Aberdeen, it's all I have to ask because quite frankly that's not an explanation." She said as she began standing up.

"It's an explanation for everything and I get it was shitty, but at least I came forward and explained it all." I said, slightly raising my voice.

"No it's not an explanation, it's excuses. Too many excuses." She said raising her voice too.

"What? You want me to fabricate my explanations so it sounds more like something you want to hear?" I raised my voice.

"No I want a proper explanation—not excuses. All you've given me for the last ten minutes is excuses."

"I explained!" I shouted.

"No all you did was throw excuse after excuse at me. I haven't heard a single explanation from you."

"I explained Kira! Was all of what I just said no use to you?" I asked sarcastically.

"No because quite frankly, listening to other people is just an excuse. It doesn't serve a purpose." She said and walked closer to me.

"It's why I stepped away! I was listening to other people! I don't know how much more I can explain that to you." I shouted.