Belladonna | 18 +

Forty two | Talks & pancakes

✺ Birdie's POV ✺

I woke up in bed alone again. In Kira's bed alone again.

Last night was unexpected in the best way possible. To just be with her again, to hold her and have her hold me, touch me—she made me feel better than I have in the last few weeks. It was all too great.

Except for when I might've fucked it up after our shower.

I know that I shouldn't have said what I said because I could tell it hurt her or might've pushed her buttons the wrong way but the question was sprung on me.

She traced her fingers over it in the shower and that alone made me turn away. That scar isn't something I'm proud of and I never will be.

Telling Kira about it feels like she'll see a different side to me that I'm not sure even I like.

But I shouldn't have acted like that, especially because I have genuine feelings for her and we aren't just having sex, I feel good with her, all the time.

I stretched and sat up before checking the time. It was 9:30 am, not too early but also the latest I'd ever gotten up at Kira's place. 

I decided to go look for her, I knew exactly where she was too because it's the only place she is when she wakes up early.

I made my way downstairs and was immediately greeted by Loki. He's such a sweetheart and just thinks he's a giant lap dog when he's definitely bigger than a lap dog.

I said hello then walked past him to Kira's office where he followed behind me. I knocked gently and waited for her to tell me I could come in.

"Come in," she said.

"Hi," I cracked the door open and walked in too.

"Hi bella," she smiled. "come here." She said and opened her arms for me.

My heart did a little jump as I walked over. I smiled gently and stopped in front of her before she led me to sit on her lap.

I buried my head in her neck and let her familiar floral scent wrap around me even more. Her hands wrapped around me and she placed a kiss on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I said against her skin. "for last night, I'm sorry for reacting like that."

"It's okay bella," she said softly. "I just wanted to make sure you're alright. It looked sore, bambina." She ran her hand over the scar once again.

It took everything in me not to relive that memory. I closed my eyes and just focused on her while her fingers ran over it again and again.

"What happened bambina?" She asked.

"Nothing," I said softly this time instead of harshly like last night.

She placed a soft hand on my cheek and made me look at her. Her face was soft and sincere, not a hint of judgment was held on her face. I think this was the softest I've ever seen her. That alone made tears gather in my eyes lightly.

I didn't want to cry but I've never talked about this before. And even when I tried to, I was just told to pretend it was a different accident. I was taught to cover it and not tell the story.

I'd grown embarrassed of it all.

"You can tell me bella," she said softly. "It's not gonna go anywhere. I won't judge you for it either, you can trust me." Her voice was gentle and soft.

I want to trust her—so much of me wants to trust her—but I'm scared. It's a part of me that doesn't make people stay, it does the opposite because no one wants to deal with the baggage that comes with it.