Belladonna | 18 +

Fifty two | Morning after & support

I woke up to little whispers in the room and it wasn't long until Skye was at my side. "Are you still sleeping?" Her little voice asked.

I opened my eyes a little. Savannah was next to me and Serenity was curled up next to her. Skye had on her red and green set of Christmas pyjamas and her hair was all frizzy and curls hung loose. She was smiling widely next to me.

"Hi Skye," I said with a smile.

She squeal. "Okay you're awake!" She smiled. "Can I jump in?"

"Skye bug, what does your mommy always say?" Savannah said sleepily.

"To sleep in my own bed—but Ren is here why can't I?" She whined.

"Okay, get in sweetheart." Savannah said and Skye crawled into the middle of us. She curled up and went into savannahs arms.

"Where's mommy?" Skye asked.

"Yeah, where is she?" Serenity asked.

I laid back down and didn't really think about her daughters last night, I was selfish for that. I think overall I was pretty selfish.

"She's with Kira, bug,"

"Oh okay," they both said together.

"B, what happened last night?" Savannah asked as she stretched lightly.

I thought back to last night, I was wrong. And selfish, so incredibly wrong and selfish. Kira was only doing what was best in the moments.

I lashed out at her for simply just being there. I'll admit, the sound of the slap sent me into fight or flight, I knew it was Kira but something in me expected that for me. To feel the sting and burning sensation on my skin.

I felt bad, I didn't want her in my mess so I kind of sabotaged things for myself with her. I'm not used to having someone say something, all I've ever known is keeping my head down.

After sleeping on it, I woke up and realised I was such an asshole, for no reasons too. 

I owed her an apology.

"Why don't you guys go pick out what you want to wear today and then you can come back and we can cuddle and watch Bluey." Savannah said to both the girls.

They smiled and agreed. "Kira and I had an argument." I sighed.

"Yeah no shit B but what about?" She asked.

"Some stuff happened and I shouted, she did what was right in the moment and I got selfish about it all. I said some shit I really shouldn't have." I sighed and placed my head in my hands.

"I'm gonna be honest Birdie," she sighed. "You don't always think things through. Whether it hurts the other person or not—and I get that, don't get me wrong, I understand the whole self sabotage thing but you need to talk to her, not run from it all." She said offering me some advice and tough love.

"I know, I need to talk to her." I sighed.

"A hell of a lot more." She said. "Don't rush to the argument strategy because it's the quickest way to process things, just be up front about it all with Kira, talk to her." She said with a small smile.

Savannah had a point, more than one. And it was all things I needed to do. I needed to put my self sabotaging aside because at the end of the day, it's going to be my downfall with the person I care about the most.

"I think I'm gonna head back," I sighed. "I feel bad. Really guilty actually,"

"Good because I need my girlfriend back, we need to take a long nap because as much as I love you B, I did not sleep well last night," she cracked a smile.