Conan was right. Once you've found something or someone you love, you've found Heaven.
It's never too late, you know.
I worried for a while. I think a lot of last year I was so focused on finding someone that it sucked a lot of the happiness out of me. I got to a point where I was trying to date but at the same time not. I didn't want a repeat of the last relationship.
I think I lost a lot of myself in that one. I was always told that whatever I wanted to do, I couldn't. It was because they didn't want to get a job.
A teacher? Nope. You can't make a family of three survive off of one teachers salary.
A sprint car driver? Sure, they make a lot of money, but what if something happens? Who's going to provide then?
Band director? Noise gave them too much of a headache. God knows what a clarinet would have done.
Choir director? Again, noise. This one was kind of weird because they were in choir.
My point here is, is that I based my life off of someone who obviously didn't care about who I was.
I was so focused on what the older people were saying that I forgot what I wanted.
I was so focused on doing what society says women are for. Becoming a wife, changing your last name, and having children.
I forgot about history.
History has been my love for years. Since I was little. I let it slip away.
I used to want to be a history teacher. I'm letting that dream come back.
I'm determining my life.
I've found heaven.
