Impress Me Not: Neon Underground

Chapter 78

He should have just stayed in bed. He should have just ignored his phone and pulled the covers over himself. Fresh air seemed to cripple him further. At least, fresh air when it was met with cold rain. It just made his chest congested and heavy. He was hacking a bunch of it up as soon as he got into that hot shower.

It didn't mean that he wasn't going to stop holding him, though. Not even if his chest was killing him. It felt too good to have him in his arms.

"Is the medicine helping at all?" Mateo asked. He spoke quietly, rubbing his back. He didn't show any signs of moving away from him that entire day. It felt good to have him close.

"Yeah," Melvin coughed into his pillow. "I might have to see if I can get more antibiotics though. I don't think it's just going to be a week of this."

"Mel," Mateo sighed, resting his head on his shoulder. "Please don't do that again."

"I'm not going to," he promised. "I'm just an idiot."

"You are not an idiot," Mateo hugged him tighter. "Don't ever think like that."

Melvin hadn't had someone to speak his thoughts out like this in a long time. Actually, the last time had been when he was in therapy. He learned back then that he shouldn't tell people what his thoughts were. It almost led to him being admitted somewhere. He had fought against depression for a long, long time.

He thought he finally got rid of it. At least, the part of him wanting to die. He had many things to live for. His cousins and his business were the greatest ones, along with the friends that he considered his family. They had still stopped by to make sure he was okay. Mateo had turned a few of them down that day, though. Melvin didn't want anyone to see him like this.

He thought those would be reasons enough to want to live. It made logical sense, and he was happy with his business and his strange family. Melvin thought that he was okay with his life. He was comfortable.

All it took was one phone call to bring all those old emotions back. Melvin had contemplated killing himself a lot when he was a teenager. Even worse when he was kicked out of his parent's house. Melvin thought he had gotten over that. He was an idiot for thinking that man would stay away from him the rest of his life. One phone call later and he felt like he was a teenager all over again, trying to convince both his parents along with himself that he was perfectly normal.

His eyes felt warm again as he hid them in Mateo's shoulder. He tried to control his breathing so that he wouldn't think anything of it. But Mateo was too good at reading him. He didn't say anything, just pulled him closer. It was the first time that Melvin had ever cried in front of someone. He hated crying. It led to too many questions. But Mateo didn't even think to ask him anything. He just pulled the covers around the two of them, rubbing his back.

"Your arms make pretty good restraints," Mateo joked softly into his hair. "You know that?"

Melvin laughed in the middle of a sob. He had been quiet, but that brought it out. At least he wasn't crying too badly after that. Melvin just shook his head, pulling Mateo closer, if that were even possible.

"All the more to keep you here."

"You don't need restraints to do that," Mateo chuckled. "Although, they are pretty fun."

"You should give them a try some time," he said, wiping the tears from his eyes. "You might find yourself enjoying making knots."

"Only if it's on you."

"You might make a good Dom, you know," he told him. "If you ever want to switch roles, that is."

"You mean in your club?" Mateo looked at him curiously.

"You'd get a lot of clients," he pulled away, shrugging. "Just saying."

"I don't think I could do anything like that," he shook his head, grabbing some tissues for Melvin. "It just...feels too personal to me."

"I'm not saying you have to have sex with them," Melvin blew his nose. He didn't know why he had brought it up. It was just the first thing that came to his mind that wasn't related to his parents. "You could create your own rules in those rooms."

"Mel," Those green eyes met Melvin's, capturing his heart inside them. "I don't think I'd ever want to do something like that with anyone but you."

It was like being trapped in a room of emeralds. It might not be the most valuable gem, but Melvin felt rich trapped inside those gorgeous eyes. They had been so hard and rough when he first saw them, but they smoothed and softened under the heat they shared. They molded into something Melvin wasn't sure he'd ever understand. He wasn't sure if he even wanted to understand it. All he cared about was that they only let him inside. Only he could enjoy that beauty.

"Why is it so easy to fall for you?" He smiled at him. All it took was that for warm joy to come out of that gaze. His whole face brightened up as his goofy smile grew.

"I don't know," Mateo answered. He had been leaning on his arm, but he looked down at him. "Why do you have to be sick when I want to kiss you the most?"

"I knew you had a praise kink," he laughed, trying to sound as normal as he could with all the congestion in his chest. It still sounded off, and his throat was full of mucus that wasn't wanting to come up.

"What's a praise kink?" Mateo asked.

"Someone who gets off on being praised."

"That doesn't make sense," Mateo furrowed his eyebrows. "Doesn't everyone like to be complimented?"

"I'm sure most do," Melvin smirked, getting closer to Mateo's ear. "They just don't get turned on when they get told just how good they are."

Oh, how he wished he wasn't sick right then. The way this toned man completely shuttered in his arms from just a few words was addicting. Every reaction that body had to Melvin just fed into his own desire to keep him in his arms forever. Every breath he breathed pulled Melvin closer to him. He swore, he was never going to be able to tear himself apart from him.

"You're such a tease," Mateo leaned into him. "You better get over this soon."

"I will," Melvin closed his eyes, his head falling back onto his pillow again. "I'm sorry for yelling at you."

"Pfft!" Mateo shook his head. "Like I would ever get hurt by you yelling. You forget that I was the one who still came back every night after you tried to scare me off in the first place."

"I don't think I could ever forget that," Melvin smiled. It was fun to think back on those days. Everything about Mateo fascinated him, even though he wouldn't admit it. And feeling wanted, even in the strange way that Mateo did at first, was addicting.

That was the pull that he had. Mateo always wanted him, in every single way possible. Even Melvin's bad side wasn't enough to scare him off, which was surprising to him. Melvin had scared many people away, and most of them wasn't intentional. Melvin had learned to keep many at an arms' length. And why he didn't have many lovers the older he got.

"Can I ask you something?" Melvin broke the sweet silence they shared. There had been so much of it lately. The man sharing his bed took him to a dream state most days, perfectly comfortable as long as he was there.

"Sure," Mateo said, moving his face into his neck.

"What were you thinking about when you were trying to get me to come back inside?" Melvin asked. There was a lot of passion in those emerald eyes when they were standing in the rain. It looked like they weren't completely focused on their conversation. Like there was something else on his mind.

"That I wasn't going to let you hurt yourself just because of your father," Mateo answered. "I didn't want you to go through what I did."