unspeakable | jegulus

cold flame (in the heart of man)

chapter title: land: horses / land of a thousand dances / la mer(de) by patti smith

He lit a cigarette and leaned against a lemon yellow car parked outside of Number Twelve while he smoked. He shook snow out of his hair.

"Hey,"  A stranger said to him. James looked up from the end of his smoke,  grateful he'd lit it without taking out his wand. He hadn't even noticed  the muggle was there. "You know, most people find it rude to lean on a  car that doesn't belong to them." She had short, boyish brown hair and  wide set green eyes. She seemed like she was about his age, maybe a bit  older.

"Is it really rude?" James stood immediately, and  she laughed. She had a laugh like a bird, high in her throat and without  any force in it. A shallow laugh. "Shit, is this your car? Sorry, I  didn't know."

"If you bum me one of those, I might be  willing to forgive you for your transgressions." She was looking at him  impishly. There was something about her that made him think of the elves  in Lord of the Rings. Pretty and graceful. She was taller than most  girls he'd met. Skinny as a birch tree. James offered her his pack of  smokes. "Thanks." She took one, dug a zippo lighter out of the pocket of  her trench coat, and leaned against the yellow car where he had been,  sucking on a cigarette. Alarm bells went off in the back of his mind.  Someone might see him consorting with a muggle, Walburga might  see him. But he couldn't go inside now, not with her here. He just had  to stick this out until she left. He had no other choice. "I haven't  seen you around here before."

"Yeah, um," he fumbled with  his words, shit, she was a muggle, he couldn't just tell her he was  around here because of his boyfriend, could he? Though, telling her that  might get rid of her. He couldn't meet her inquisitive eyes. "I know  someone who lives in one of these townhouses, I'm just staying with him  for the holidays. School is out, and all."

"Don't you have  your own folks to stay with?" She was wearing lipstick. It got on her  long fingers and all over the filter of the cigarette. James didn't know  very many girls that smoked, but he sort of wished he did. He liked  those little things you got to see when you spent time with a girl. A  glimpse of her brushing her hair in front of a mirror. Her nail polish  getting chipped. The way she curled her eyelashes. Lipstick on the  filter of a cigarette.

"We're really... close." James  rubbed the back of his neck, messed with his hair—that nervous habit—and  sucked another breath of smoke into his lungs. "I've known him for a  long time." True enough. The muggle girl peered up at him and blinked  very slowly.

"I'd like to see more of you, around here,  if you don't mind." Oh. James felt stupid. His face burned. "I live in  one of these townhouses, like your friend. Maybe we could see a movie,"  she was speaking with a cloying edge to her voice that he didn't like.  "Or get hot cocoa. It's been awfully cold out lately."

"I  don't even know your name." He wanted to hide his face in his hands.  This had happened to him before, girls coming up to him out of the blue,  but these past months had been a reprieve from it. One perk of being a  social pariah was girls leaving you alone. Not this girl. This muggle girl.

"Antonia."  She had crooked teeth, like Regulus, and green eyes, like Lily.  "Sometimes people call me Tony." A girl named Tony. Maybe she wouldn't  care about Regulus after all. That was a shallow thought to have, but  still...

"I'm not... um..." He'd never felt so awkward in  his life. He didn't know how to speak to muggles. "I'm taken, so we  can't go out, if that's what you're after. I'm flattered if you are." He  half unconsciously spun the silver ring around on his finger. Tony's  eyes flitted down to the motion. Her eyelashes were sticky-looking and  black.