unspeakable | jegulus

(too much in love)

chapter title: misty by lesley gore

James wandered a bit off of the path into the untouched snow, and slowly showed him the motion to cast. The swirling spiral. "Expecto Patronum." He enunciated the incantation very clearly. Prongs shimmered in the sunlight and  trotted around both of them in circles. He stopped in front of Regulus and inclined his head. James looked at Regulus, wide eyed with wonder, and something warm blossomed in his chest. His own happiness radiated from Prongs. Regulus looked at him and smiled ever so slightly, barely more than one corner of his mouth turning up, barely more than a crinkle in his eye.

"Why does it feel so warm?" Regulus asked. James shrugged. "Is it to fight off the dementors? I don't see how that would help. It's nice, though." James dismissed his patronus with a wave of his wand.

"You try now." He walked toward him through the snow, his pale eyes downcast. "Face me, so I can see if you're doing the wand movement correctly."

"Yeah, alright." Regulus reluctantly stood in front of him. "This really isn't my thing, you know. Dark wizards and light spells go together about as well as... I don't know. What's something that doesn't go together at all?"

"If I can cast blood magic, you can do this." James smiled at him encouragingly. "You just need one happy memory. Purely happy. Focus on the feeling you get when you remember it, let it fill you, then focus that happiness into the spell. Funnel it, almost. If you don't have a happy enough memory, you can try to imagine something that makes you feel pure happiness. It's similar to occlumency in a way. The only difference is... you need to channel joy instead of an absence of feeling. You ready?" He shrugged.

"Probably not."

"Don't be such a pessimist. Aren't Slytherins supposed to be ambitious or something?" Regulus rolled his eyes.

He squared his shoulders, and did the wand motion once, twice, three times, then finally, "Expecto Patronum." A cloud of pale misty light appeared in front of him, nearly as bright as the sunlight. James could feel warmth radiating from the spell. Regulus kept it up until James raised a hand.

"Good. Most people don't even get an incorporeal patronus. Ever. Don't be discouraged, it's a difficult spell, it probably has nothing to do with the memory you chose." Regulus groaned.

"What am I doing wrong, then?"

"You need to refine your wand movements. You also need to actually believe you can cast it, Reg. Think of it this way: your patronus can smell fear and negative emotion, like doubt. You need to welcome it with happiness, and calm, and confidence. I believe in you. You need to believe in yourself." Regulus smiled tightly.

"James, I really don't—" He had an idea.

"Peter can cast a corporeal patronus. So can Sirius. Do you really think they're stronger than you are?" His nose wrinkled at the thought. "You called Sirius weak. How can you say that when he can cast this spell and you can't?"

Regulus stiffened. James realized an important fact about him, watching his defiant expression harden into pure determination.

Regulus Black hates losing.

All James had to do was make this a competition.

"I can always ask Sirius for advice on your behalf, if you can't get it." James watched Regulus' grip tighten on his wand until his knuckles were white. "It's very advanced magic. I understand if you need a little extra help."

"Shut up." Regulus squared his shoulders again and took a deep, steadying breath. This time, when he did the motion for the spell, it was perfect. "Expecto Patronum." Another cloud of mist. He dismissed it immediately. "Expecto Patronum." James watched him try to cast the spell over and over again with a deep sense of satisfaction.