unspeakable | jegulus

mine for the taking

chapter title: career of evil by blue öyster cult

Madam Pomfrey didn't fuss over him nearly as much as James expected she would. She seemed reluctant to spend any amount of time in his room at all. Her attention flitted to Regulus over and over again, while he watched her hawkishly through her every movement and every question. She seemed to regard Regulus in a manner that seemed almost nervous. When she saw that James was alert and aware enough to have a normal conversation with her she moved him into the main infirmary.

"Alright, all of your vitals are good." She scribbled something on a bit of parchment while her attention flitted over him from the top of his head to his toes beneath the blanket. She pulled the blanket back and frowned at the bruises on his legs, a cold hand running over his calf to his battered knee. "Physically I'd say you're almost entirely recovered from this ordeal. Mentally, though, is another matter entirely. Tell me, James, are you having any thoughts about harming yourself or others? Any urges?" She looked at him over her little wire-framed reading glasses very seriously. "Do you plan to harm yourself again?"

James had a lie ready on the end of his tongue. He tried to look sad-eyed and sweet. He tried to look gentle.

"No. Absolutely not. I'm very sorry I frightened everyone so much. I feel a lot better now. I'm grateful I'm alive, I know how lucky I am. Things could have gone very differently, if Regulus hadn't found me so quickly. Thank you for saving me. If you didn't get the poison out of my system I would be dead. That's terrifying, isn't it?" He tried his best not to oversell it. He kept his voice very small. "I can't believe it was me that did all of that, it feels like it must have been another person entirely. I feel much, much better now that I'm sleeping properly."

Wearing a mask felt easier than being honest ever had.

Madam Pomfrey was always so businesslike and cold, it was deeply disconcerting when she smiled at him and patted his shoulder with an affection that was nearly warm.

"Well, I'm glad to hear that. I'm sure you'll be out of the infirmary in no time." She fussed over his blankets with renewed vigour, covering him up in bleached linens again and placing a bottle of dreamless sleep on his bedside table. "I'll get you some fresh robes ready in the washroom, you can shower here." After a moment of hesitation she said, "Mister Black, feel free to use the facilities as well if you wish, since you insist on staying here with James so vehemently."

"Thank you very much, Madam Pomfrey," Regulus said stiffly. She nodded at him without meeting his eyes.

"Right, I'll be back shortly to check on you again." She fixed her attention on James sharply, with a rare and deep intensity. "For what it's worth, I'm also very grateful you're alive, Mister Potter."

James opened his mouth to reply, but she was gone before he managed to form a single word.

"It's disgraceful they let a half-breed run something as vital as an infirmary," Regulus muttered quietly.

James spun in his bed to glare at Regulus.

"Excuse me?" It shouldn't surprise him to hear appalling things come out of his mouth now that he knew him so very well, but somehow it never stopped being viscerally shocking, almost dizzying, like getting punched in the stomach. Regulus shrugged. He flicked his wand and cast a muffling charm around James' little curtained section of the infirmary. His eyes gleamed mean. He looked vicious, sort of mischievous, and very, very amused.

"She's a half-breed. Half muggle, the worst sort, not even the tragic spawn of a couple of other half-breeds, or a half-breed and a mudblood. She's barely a witch. She shouldn't be given so much control over the lives of proper magical children, it's not right."