Twisted tale of Negan

cold

Negan pov

"Negaaan its so cold! Come up to bed with me!" Lucy shouts from the staircase.

I simply shake my head no.

"Babe whats wrong?" she comes over to me and wraps her arms around me from behind.

I sigh, what isnt wrong? I mean honestly. Ive fucked up everything, and yet she is still here. I don't even deserve her. She was right, you know. I'm weak, sure i might be strong. But emotionally I'm weak.

"Hm? Nothin hon" lie

I look over to see her wearing one of my t shirts and short shorts "no wonder you're freezing, you have hardly any clothes on" i chuckled.

She walks around to the kitchen and I'm guessing she found the liquor cabinet, because she walks in carrying a bottle of vodka, and a cup.

"Wheres the other cup?"

She sets the cup on the table and laughs "oh no no, the cup is for you. The bottle is mine"

She smirks pouring just a little bit into the cup. And handing it to me.

She takes a swig of the vodka and makes a weird looking face "ughhh it burns!" she cried out.

I laugh at that girl and take a sip out of the cup "yeah no kidding" this was indeed some strong vodka.

-----------

As the night went on Lucy and i got to talk more and more i was messing around with her hand when i notice she still has her rings.

"You still have them?" i look down at the dirt covered diamond ring.

She smiled softly "yeah. Why wouldn't i?"

I instantly felt like shit because i tossed mine out after i left Lucy, it was a constant reminder of what i did.

She noticed i didnt have mine.

"Its okay, not like it actually means anything anyways" she takes another long swig of the vodka..

I feel so bad, I mean. I really thought I would never see Lucy again

She continues "it's not like any one checks these days if you're married or not.."

I nod.

"Did you sleep with Denise chick?"

I look into her big doe eyes and her face in unreadable.

"Do you want the absolute truth?" I ask rubbing the back of my neck nervously.

"Yes. Of course."

I start to tell her the story about Denise, and what I thought she meant to me. I told her the harsh truth, the only reason I was emotionally involved with Denise was because I was trying to get her out of my head. After I left her, all I could see is her. All I could hear is her. I felt so much regret, I felt so guilty for leaving the love of my life behind for my own selfish needs.

She listened, and not once interrupted me.

After I was done she nodded and started chugging the bottle of vodka.

"What about you? Was there a man you.."

She cut me off "yeah, there was this guy named John.."

I could quickly tell she was lying, I know this woman inside and out.

"Oh yeah?" I chug down the glass.

She nodded "yeah, tall buff dude. Real good.. Real real good." She is turning all red.

"You're lying, you're terrible at it." I laughed, it's so sad she thinks she can lie to me and me not find out.

She shrugged "yeah.. I am" she starts making a noise, and I'm not sure if she is laughing, or crying. It was so quiet.

I hold out my arms for her, and she fell into them. I wrap my arms around her and rock her back and forth.

As I'm holding her I notice she had all of these scars on her, scars I know I didn't put there, I've only laid my hands on her twice.. And those were both not meant to happen..

"What are these on you?" I ask tracing over them with my fingers

She starts to shiver at my touch. "Nothing negan.."

"Who did this?" I ask raising my voice.

Who the fuck laid their hands on what's mine!

"I told you.. John."
"there's no way these here are out of love. They seem too deep" I inspect the scars even more

My blood starts to boil, this man she is talking about did not just have sex with her, he hit her, something. This isn't okay! I will kill this fucker. I don't care.

"Where is this son of a bitch?"

"Dead.." She spoke frightened.

"How'd he die?" I demand to know.

"I had to.. Kill him."

The room fell silent for a second. And I just wanted to hold her in my arms, I should have never left her. And I wouldn't if I knew another man would bring her pain. I know that it's not that different from me, but god damn it! Lucy knows I don't mean it.

She starts breathing lightly, and I know she is about to fall asleep in my arms. Which is fine, this is where I want her. I want her in my arms forever, for me to hold on, for my own sanity's sake.

"Lucy?" I ask messing with her hair.

"Hm?" She mumbles half asleep.

"I'm never leaving you again. Do you hear me? Never again..."

I sit there for a second and all of a sudden she starts snoring lightly.

I smile softly to myself and kiss her forehead

"i promise Lucy.."