Twisted tale of Negan

Panic

Rick, Katherine and i were all somehow carried into a room, where we were seeking help. they wanted to help me first but i declined, i wanted all of my medical help and energy to be focused on katherine, i know im fine, maybe just a mild concussion. 

i lay on the bed anxiously, next to rick as the try and get Katherine alive, or something. to be quite honest i think she is.. gone. 

the only reason im here next to rick is to look after him, he obviously needs someone beside him right now, people are outside trying to clean up the bodies and rubble from earlier. im sure thats where negan is too. 

which is fine, i just dont think he can take seeing me and Katherine in this condition that we are in. i dont think negan can take a death very well at the moment, considering that we dont even know if im still pregnant or not, because time can only tell. its stressful, he is in a dark place right now, and i guess thats why he wanted to get out for awhile, away from me and my problems that i keep bringing upon him. its not fair for me to be this way to him, its not fair to keep adding this stress to the man that i supposedly love. 

'hes gonna be alright.." ricks voice sounded from next to me. 

i lean on my side and stare at him, with his eyes closed, he looks somewhat peaceful. 

"how do you know? he could be fucking rosita right now." i quickly stop talking, considering i just spilled the secret that i wasn't going to tell anyone. not that negan didn't want me to, but for my own dignity's sake. 

'what?" rick asks in disbelief. 

"nothing, not my business to tell." i lay on my back again and stare at the ceiling, my hands linger to my belly and i place them flat on my belly, trying to see if i can feel anything, but of-course i wont, its too early to tell anyways. 

ricks body tenses up "that selfish fucking prick i hate him" he says. 

i quickly stand up, causing me to get a little dizzy "you haven't even given him a chance!" 

"oh trust me, i have. ive given him several. he proves he doesn't deserve you" 

"oh yeah, and what makes you so sure you deserve me huh?" 

silence fell. and it was awkward. i put my hands in my hoodie and sigh out "rick im-" 

"i think you should leave Lucy" 

i nod, and respect his decision by walking downstairs where they had Katherine on a table, i watched quietly as they hooked several needles to her limp fragile body. and before i knew it they had a pulse on her. it was slow and steady. 

they clapped and high fived each other. i smiled ear to ear, as my little girl is alive, i cant wait to tell negan.

"whyd you leave Negan?" amber asks as sweetly as she can. 

i shrug "they carried me here, as you can see  im fine.. thanks for saving my little girl." 

"i didnt do it for you.. i did it for him" she nods towards negan who is approaching us. 

i narrow my eyes at her and turn towards negan, who quickly scooped me into his arms like he did when we first got together. 

"negan" i squealed as im being held by him. i can just sense ambers jealousy. 

"shes safe baby.." negan says relieved. 

"yes, hopefully.." 

"and you are too? i didn't know where you ran off to. i thought you died.." 

i look into his eyes "you think its that easy to get rid of me?" i teased. 

he attached his lips to mine, and kissed me passionately. "im glad my girls are okay.." 

just then ambers voice spoke up "you guys are welcome to go home, we have her in a stable condition, we just want to take some tests" 

'what about rick?" i ask. negan furrows his eyebrows together and looks at me. i mentally slap myself, great i will never hear the end of this one. 

"he will be fine lucy" and with that she walks away. 

nean purses his lips together "why did you ask about prick?" he grabs my hand as we walk out of the house. 

i take in what Alexandria is, we are definitely broken, everyone has had enough. maybe its time to say goodbye to Alexandria, the gates arent holding up, hostilities everywhere around us, our security isn't what it used to be.. this isn't stable for families at all. 

"hello?" negan asks impatiently 

"sorry, i was just looking.. i dont care about him.. i just, he saved katherine." i really do care for rick? why am i lying.. 

"well i would have too.. i just, i froze" negan says. 

"its not your fault babe.."

we make our way to the food garage and i see a whole line waiting outside of my house which my garage is the food one. 

"we want food!" people shouted at me. 

i sighed out "can you give me a fucking second?" 

they stopped yelling at me, they said stuff under their breath as negan and i walked into our home, i stepped on some of katherines dolls and almost tripped "damn it kid you'll be the death of me!" i joke. 

negan laughs and picks the dolls up as i walk to the garage. i make my way in and hesitantly open the doors. as soon as i did i was bombarded with questions. 

"why is rick rationing food?" 

"this is ridiculous!" 

"give me damn food! Are we running out? why haven't you gone on runs? Maggie is better at this then you!" 

and finally i had enough "everyone out!" i shout. 

suddenly it was like everyone and everything was pulsing, the sun seemed way brighter and i fell to my knees, i started hyperventilating, and before i knew it everything went black. 

---------------------------

i wake up in my bed with negan right next to me "negan?" i panic. 

he quickly holds me "Lucy its okay.. you had a panic attack." he says "But dont worry baby ive got you"  

i roll so im facing him, i buried my face into his chest "negan i dont know how much more i can take this" 

he holds me tighter "dont say that baby.. we can do this, you are strong.. baby we just have to keep fighting" 

"for how much longer?" i whine. 

he laughs and holds me tighter "until things are allowed to be okay again. now go to sleep again, tomorrow we can see Katherine." 

"what about rick?" 

i feel him sigh out in annoyance but he tried to keep his cool "yes baby, and rick too" 

i smile into his chest and kiss it "good night negan" 

"good night princess"