Will you still love me even if I'm a man?

Chapter 68: A Disastrous State of Mind

Translated by: Angela // Dynasty of Like Love Lovers

If there really is a day when life no longer has pressure, days no longer repeat one after another, annoying people no longer make sound next to your ears, money no longer has worth. Everything goes as planned, every person you hate disappears one by one, you can eat a lot of food while lounging on the couch yet you can't get fat, and buying things no longer need money.

If there really is a day like that, it wouldn't be heaven, it would be hell.

Always living in the light will make you lose sight of hope, only living in darkness will make you look forward to dawn.

Losing the meaning to keep on living, endless squandering, each person lives in the depths of hell. No one is better off than the other. Most people like to put their own complaints and grievances under a microscope, making a bigger deal out of them, saying things like: my world is grey, the surrounding people are so annoying, and I can't keep going on like this. No one understands what I want because emotions are too chaotic, the mind is full of negative thoughts.

This is life.

If you can continue, you are a fighter. If you can't continue, then there's nothing that can be said, if you want to die, then die.

You must know, there's nothing better in life than living. Everything else becomes too small in comparison.

When Mai Ding opened his eyes, the sun was already very bright. He squinted out the window, reached out his hand, and realized An Ziyan was long gone, the bed was already cold. He then looked at the clock: it was already 10 in the morning. He woke up so late, even later than An Ziyan. Mai Ding thought it was odd, could it be that because he was always suppressed by An Ziyan, his quality of sleep decreased as well?

Mai Ding walked on the floor barefoot, stretched, then took a deep breath: "It really is a bright and beautiful day." After, he bounced down the stairs. Grandpa An was downstairs wearing reading glasses while reading the newspaper. Today was really strange, the room was empty, and there wasn't a trance of anyone else to be seen.

"Grandpa, where did An Ziyan go?"

"I told him to go buy some things for me. You two have stayed for a few days so it's about time for you to go, but I can't have you leave here empty handed."

Indeed, Mai Ding already stayed at Grandpa An's place for three or four days now. Every day he lived the life of an emperor, so he felt reluctant to leave.

"Grandpa, you don't need to bother about that. We came to see you, yet you're buying things for us. I can't bear to leave grandpa." The thought of him leaving this house soon made Mai Ding's hair stand up on end. These days, by relying on grandpa An, he almost rose up above An Ziyan. He could clearly see that An Ziyan was enduring and enduring, but it was almost time to leave. Mai Ding started to regret tattling on An Ziyan day and night. Isn't this like he's been asking for it?

"Grandpa knows you're a good boy, but the things that need to be given still needs to be given. Oh right, Xiao Ding, help me massage my shoulders again. Yesterday I hurt it a bit while sleeping."

"Okay okay." Mai Ding nodded and went behind Grandpa, found the right spot, and began to massage.

This time, grandfather An always thought that Mai Ding was too gentle, so he constantly told Mai Ding to use more pressure in his fingers. Finally, Mai Ding rolled up his sleeves, and used all of his strength to press down on grandpa An's shoulders, thinking that it was no big deal. Mai Ding heard the snap of bones, it was very loud. Then, grandpa closed his eyes and leaned back on the sofa motionless. This surprised Mai Ding so much that he withdrew his hands and asked grandpa An with a shaky voice: "G-Grandpa, are you okay?"