I'm Not Perfect (Michael Clifford)

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I walk in the front door to find Jacob screaming while playing Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword. I have to admit that game can be pretty frustrating at times.  I walk up to him and give him a big hug from behind, pinning down his arms so he can’t play.

“Charlotte! Stooop! I can’t move the controller!” He agitatedly screams, “Get off me Char!”

I giggle and decide to stop pestering him and let him play after a few seconds of hugging. “So, Jakey, what do you want for dinner? I can order some Take Out or I can make sandwiches or soup or something.”

“hm… Take out sounds good” He replies, with his eyes glued to the tv.

“The usual?” I ask him. He usually gets Sweet n’ Sour chicken with fried rice and an eggroll.

“Sounds good.” He quickly replies before opening a treasure chest.

After ordering us both dinner, I go to my room to study for exams coming up soon. I am getting really stressed because if I don't do well it will completely ruin my chances of getting into college, which is all I want to do. Mostly to get away from this dead end town, but also because it is the start of everything. It is where my life is going to start, it will help me with work. Mostly it is just an excuse to start my life over. 

I really need to do that, my life is nothing here, I am bound down to my house because of my mother. Plus the people here don't treat me like they should, I believe everyone should be treated with respect, even if you don't know them. I don't really get that here, and I feel like I would if I started over, because I would finally be able to be myself without anyone criticizing me. 

I am afraid though, that I won't be able to make a life there. I will be tooo nervous to talk to anyone, and then my plan will be ruined. I really need all of this too work out, or I will be left with nothing. But at least with nothing left, I'll have nothing to lose.

“Charlotte! The food is here!” I hear Jacob voice echos up the stairs.

I grab some money off the nightstand and rush down the stairs. I thank the delivery man and take the food into the kitchen. I sit at the bar and start eating, Jacob should come in a minute. After he finds a stopping point in his game I hear him make his way into the kitchen.

“Hi Jakey, how was school today?” I ask him.

 “It was… fine.” He replies. I knew that reply, he definitely didn’t want to talk about it. So I change the subject.

“You’re going to miss me when I go off to college in a couple weeks, aren’t you?” I tease.

“Honestly Char, I really am. You are my best friend and it will be so different without you around.” He answers solemnly.

“Aw Jake. I’m not leaving forever, I promise I will come to visit you as often as I can.” I say while stabbing a piece of chicken with my fork.

“Good. I really will miss you” He says quietly.

"Are you sure school was okay?" I say, circling back to the subject.

"No" he replies looking at his lap.

"What happened?" I ask with concern.

"I had to eat lunch in the library again because I had no one to sit with. Also, I had a little panic attack because we had to present projects in history" he says, going through the memories from today.

"I think once I leave everything will be better. Mom will have more time to give you attention, plus I signed you up for literature club" I say, putting food in my mouth so I can't reply to his response.

"You what?" he exclaims, dropping his fork.

"I signed you up for the book club" I respond, swallowing my food.

"What would you go and do something like that for?" he says, staring at me with wide eyes.

"I want you to meet more people" I say casually.

"I am going to look even more like a nerd" he sighs, beginning to eat again.

"It doesn't matter, because after middle and high school people don't care. And to be honest, they don't care now, so be yourself, do things that make you happy, Jake." I explain, "I made the mistake of caring too much and it ruinied the whole experience, and I don't want that to happen to you. Just be yourself"

"But no one likes who I am" he exhales.

"Who cares, if you like who you are, then there is nothing to worry about." I assure him, and there is truth behind it.

“I love you, Jake. You’re going to be fine without me. I promise you.” I state, sadness filling my voice.

“I love you too. I sure hope I’ll be okay” He says with worry.

“You will Jakey. Well, I’m going upstairs for the night. Sleep well.” I say while kissing him on the cheek. I place my garbage in the waste bin, allong with Jacobs.

“G’night Char.” He plainly states. "By the way, will you stop calling me Jakey? I'm not 6"

"No, I won't, no matter how old you are.And don't stay up too late, okay?" I smile.

"Yeah, yeah" he groans in annoyance.

He walks back to his game while I go back upstairs. After studying for a while I hear my mother come home but I don’t bother to talk to her because I know she’ll be in one of her moods, I’ll tell her how my audition went on the ride to school tomorrow. I study for a bit longer, then I get ready for bed. I lay down and put on my ‘sleep’ mix to help me fall into dreamland. After thinking  a bit too deeply, I slowly drift off to sleep with the aching weight of the future racking my brain