A Glimpse of Forever

April 2013 - Just the Beginning

Chapter 29

April 2013 - Just the Beginning 

I felt strange. It’s been a whole day since Chris and I broke up. It is strange knowing that the things we once did together, we could never do again. I’ve been down about it, no tears as of yet but I definitely felt sad. I spent a whole year of my life with the one person and I can’t help but think about the good memories. However, no matter how much I think and how much I get sad, I won’t take him back. Chris was a huge part of my life and I will always remember our time together. Sometimes in life you meet people who affect you in weird ways. As much as you may love these people, they aren’t meant to stay in your life. I believe Chris is one of those people. I love him and I probably always will but that part of my life is over, he is a part of my past. I shouldn’t get too caught up in my past because I have to focus on my future and the things that my future holds. Speaking of my future, I have some news for a certain neighbour.

I wanted him to be the first to know what happened between Chris and I. Ryan was always a great friend. No matter what his feelings were, he would always be there to listen to my issues. I was getting rather excited to share the news which made me feel worse. What person is happy to tell someone that she just broke up with her boyfriend? Pushing the guilt down to the depths of my stomach, I knocked on Ryan’s door. My hands had started shaking. I could feel my heart pound in my chest. It only got worse when he opened the door and I saw his face light up when our eyes met. He invited me in and made me a coffee as I took a seat on the couch. He walked over with the cup of coffee, lightly placing it on the table in front of me, “What brings you ‘round?”

I was about to go on and tell him what happened but for some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I couldn’t form the words and let them leave my mouth, “Um, I just wanted to see you”

Ryan seemed pleased with my answer and thought nothing of it. We continued going about our conversation, I had started to get restless. I needed to get up and walk. Completely brushing our conversation aside, I stood up and spoke, “Let’s go outside”

Ryan looked at me rather puzzled, “Outside? Where? Why?”

“To the park. I feel like walking”

“This is so unlike you Melly. You usually don’t leave your apartment unless you have work”

“Hey, I leave my apartment to come over here”

Ryan lightly chuckled to himself as he rose from his seat and put his shoes on.  

****

We strolled down the sidewalk, making our way to the nearby park and I so desperately wanted to hold his hand.  We stood so close that every so often, his hand would graze mine leaving it to feel empty and in need of his presence.

We got to the park and I immediately made my way to the swing. Now that we were here, I had to come up with a reason for our little adventure. Ryan wasn’t going to accept that I wanted to go for a walk.

“So, why are we really here?”

Crap…why were we here? My mind drew a blank for an excuse. Any other day I would be trying to avoid eye contact with others but today, I felt the need to be public. I don’t know what it was, whether it was the clear sky or Ryan’s perfect smile but whatever it was, my feelings were becoming crystal clear. This consuming urge flowed through me as if there was a supernatural power moving my body. I got off the swing, stood in front of Ryan and pressed my lips to his. At first, he went with it, kissing me back but then he realised that our relationship was meant to be kept a secret due to Chris. He pulled away, staring at me with panicked eyes, “What are you doing? Someone might see”

I couldn’t help but laugh. He was so cute when he worried, his little nose scrunched up, “Don’t worry darling. I think we’ll be fine”

“Fine? Why are you so calm? What if Chris had walked past?”

Ryan’s head turned around to face the street behind us, looking to see if Chris was anywhere to be seen.

“I’m calm because I’m pretty sure I love you”

Ryan’s head quickly snapped back to face me, “You’re pretty sure you what?”

“Ryan, I’m more then pretty sure that I have fallen for you. Again”

A smile spread across Ryan’s face, a bright sparkle made his eyes shine. He looked so over taken with happiness. For a second, he looked genuinely delighted, then worry took over and spoilt his mood, “What about Chris?”

I lightly brushed my hand across his cheek, “I ended it yesterday…for good”

Ryan’s face once again was enlightened with joy. He let out a laugh as he picked me up and spun me around. Slowly placing me back on the ground, he looked deep into my eyes, “What does this mean now?”

I thought about it for a split second before replying with a smile, “It means whatever we want it to mean”