Decisions [Septiplier]

Can't Live Without [66]

Sleep? Mark was surprised he still even knew the meaning of the word as he probably hadn't had a good night's sleep in awhile, and it was really beginning to catch up with him. And what was awful was that he felt like he had no energy to do anything anymore.

His videos were lacking and he knew that. The fans probably knew that too, as of lately, he hadn't been able to keep up with his usual schedule, meaning videos were always late. But he really couldn't be bothered to give anyone an excuse or explanation, so instead he left anyone in the dark.

He hadn't heard from or seen Jack since he left to go back to Ireland to live with his parents. Mark wondered if Jack was thinking of him... Probably not. If he was, maybe he would have called or at least something.

The Irishman had still been uploading videos to YouTube, keeping his schedule good and continuous. It was lucky for him because some of his commentary was based around his character, Antisepticeye and Halloween was coming close. So he could just cover up his not so happy attitude with the excuse that Anti is trying to mess with him again, he's just not aware of it.

Looking at his face on the screen, he looked tired. Mark wished he could be there right now. There to hold him in his arms and tell him it was going to be okay, that he truly was sorry this time, and he'd do anything to have Jack back. If not as a boyfriend, then at least as a friend. He needed Jack in his life, without Matt and Ryan and Bob and Wade being as busy as they are, he couldn't find the time to be happy without him.

Though, he wasn't going to say he was the one suffering the most out of both of them, because if anything Jack was the one who would feel the most terrible, as he was the one who saw his own boyfriend basically cheat on him.

Mark was done being childish, it was about time he woke up. But only if he had done that so much sooner, he'd still have Jack in his life. He'd still be able to snuggle up to him, kiss him and tell him how much he loved him.

Because he did love Jack. He did. Still more than anything, and he wasn't going to deny that. Even if he wasn't expecting to get him back...

The red head exhaled, hearing his phone buzzing a good few times. Amy kept trying to text him, asking if he was okay. Asking if he needed anyone and wanted her to come over.

No, that's not what he wanted. He didn't want her. He wanted Jack. He wanted Jack so badly, that it almost felt like there was a physical pain deep within his heart that wouldn't be fixed without him. His heart felt like nothing but a deep empty void at this point.

"No, stop asking and stop texting me." Mark texted back before dropping his phone to the floor beside him and closing his eyes as he leaned his head against the wall he was sitting in front of.

He only needed Jack...

****

Recording a game, that's the only thing Jack could do to keep his mind off the cruelty of life. He was currently playing another horror game, as it was still October and he needed to keep up with his whole Antisepticeye thing.

"Okay, so... It looks like I need to go down this way..." Jack said thoughtfully, commentating on the game he was playing. He was currently in a town, looking around and the place seemed pretty deserted, until he stumbled across a lone character right around a corner, which almost made him shit his pants.

"JESUS FUCKIN' CHRIST! Why have you got to be a jumpscarin' douchebag?!" He laughed, calming down.

"Okay, who are you, what's your name? Oh, it's..." He paused.

"It's Mark." He looked into the camera, unamused. "Well, that explains a lot why he's a jumpscare douche..." He laughed, before cringing and shaking his head.

"Yeah, cut that bit out." Jack spoke, letting his editor know to do that exact instruction when he'd get given the footage by Jack.

From that point on, he felt kind of awkward. Like just hearing his name alone had lowered his mood by an extreme amount. So much to the point of where he felt like he might start crying on camera.

Exhaling and pausing the game for a moment, Jack sat, placing his hand over his eyes as he just wanted to try his best not to break down. It's all he had been doing since he left Mark and arrived back in Ireland.

There it was. Tears already staining his pale cheeks, as he just broke down into a sobbing mess. He didn't want Robin to have to just watch him crying for five minutes, so he ended up walking off camera, to give himself time to recollect himself and just relax.

It's not like he found anything wrong with crying. It didn't make you any less of a person. It's just a normal emotion to feel in a time of complete sadness. But he just didn't want everyone worrying about him. He was going to be fine, as his mother had said, he would move on one day.

Eventually, he sat back at his desk after wiping the tears away, checking his face cam to make sure it didn't look too obvious that he'd been crying, just so the viewers wouldn't notice and freak out.

Placing his headphones back onto his head, he shrugged off the weird feeling he had got from the mention of Mark's name and just looked at the camera again to address Robin when he'd watch the video to edit it later on.

"Yeah, please cut that bit out too... And don't worry about it, I'm fine. Was just feeling weirdly emotional, that's all...." He paused.

"Anyway!" He started, once again becoming like his usual energetic self. "Let's continue playin' the game!"