Wasted

Chapter 16

The date with Liam! enjoy!

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His brown eyes smiling back at me, looking up and down my body what makes me feel a bit uncomfortable.

"You look beautiful." He compliments one of my daily outfits.

"Thank you." I smile and close the front door behind me. I follow him towards his car, it seems like Alison and Niall are the only people I knew who don't have their license yet. Well Alison may never have them, you never know with her. Liam opens the door for me and I try to get in as flawless as I can. But yea.. Me and flawless isn't the best combination really. I almost fall into the seat and give Liam a nervous smile but he's too kind to give a remark.

When he's in the car next to me and has his seatbelt on he starts his car.

"So uhm hi." I say, realizing I didn't greet him a bit too late.

"Hi," he laughs and pulls out of the lot. I want to ask him so many annoying questions and just fire them to him but I need to calm myself down and control my mouth.

I need to focus on his reactions and try my best to be likable cause I want him to want me. As a friend. A very good friend cause that is what I need these days. I have the best friend, Alison but I need someone who doesn't know so much about me yet and won't judge. Like a stranger who's actually my friend. Someone I can throw all my problems to without him throwing it back at me and without someone will know about it.

"So uhm how you doing?" He asks me, his eyes focussing on the road in front of us. "Great." I half lie, I'm dying from nerves. "Good." He says and I nod. "So uhm how are you?" I ask him, the nerves clear in my voice and he certainly heard it. "Good but are you okay?" He asks, really worried. "Yes.. Yes, everything is fine." I smile.

"If something is wrong you can talk to me." He offers without looking at me, what's good cause I don't want us to be the reason of an accident.

"Thank you." I mean it, I'm so thankful to him. God bless this boy. "No, thank you babe." He says. I don't know what to answer so I offer him one of my famous smiles.

My eyes dart through the car, they catch a pack of cigarettes. "Are these yours?" I ask a bit wondered. Liam doesn't look like the type of guy who smokes, not that something would be wrong about that, it just would be kind of weird.

"No no." He says. "Zayn probably forgot them here, they're his." He says. "Oh." I answer, thought so.

"Would you mind?" He asks. "Would you mind when I was a smoker?" I have to think about that. "I don't know." I answer. "I would prefer not to but I wouldn't judge you for it." I answer honestly. I have nothing against smokers, I just would never do it myself, it smells and is unhealthy and on top of that it costs a lot if money.

"We're here." He says and parks his car into a lot in front of a restaurant. He opens the door for me like a real gentleman and I get out of his car, flawless this time. He leads me inside and I have to gulp once. The white walls are decorated by huge paintings and the rooms is perfectly decorated with the most beautiful furniture I've ever seen in my life. A huge crystal luster is hanging at the ceiling and lights the darkened room. I am absolutely not dressed for this.

"Liam.. This..."

"You like it?" He asks.

"You don't have to do this, this is way too expensive I have no money for this." I admit and gulp, waiting for his reaction.

"You didn't think I was letting you pay things here." He smirks and wraps an arm around my shoulders and leads me to a small desk.

"Table for two please, Payne." He says and the guy in suit nods and tells us to follow him. He leads us to the back of the restaurant, the table next to a large window with the nicest view on the green garden of the restaurant.

Liam pulls my chair back so I can sit down before sitting down across from me.

"Liam you really didn't need to do this." I tell him again.

"Of course not." He says. "But I want to." He smiles brightly and the world stands still. I'm numb when he orders our drinks. Why would he do such and effort. I thought we would go for pizza or something. Not this. Absolutely not this.

"So.. What you want to talk about?" He asks, his smile so bright.

"I uhm.. I don't know." I say. "Liam why are you doing this? Why are you doing such an effort?" He looks a bit overwhelmed by my question.

"Uhm I.. Because I like you, I want to be closer with you." He says.

"You know I mean this as friends right?" I ask.

"Yea, you said that before." He says not showing me what he thinks about this and that drives me insane.

"So you mean this as friends too?" I ask, hoping for a yes.

"Uh sure." He says.

What? Sure? What is this? I don't want a 'sure' I want a 'yes of course I see it just like that'

But just as I want to go on about this, about how wrong this is and I literally feel nothing but friendship for him the waiter places a cocktail in front of me. Liam thanks him and we order our food. I take a sip of my cocktail, and then I realize this is alcohol. Normally I don't drink. Never. But I mean never. Maybe it's rude because Liam put such an effort into this but I'm a girl of principals. I told Liam I don't drink but he probably forgot.

Liam is talking to me, about college I think but I don't hear anything of what he's saying. I'm so confused. I'm disordered by his 'sure' and now the cocktail. My head is spinning.

I shouldn't be. I am overreacting again. Liam doesn't want to be more than friends and so do I so there's no problem here. Like Louis said: I have to enjoy the moment. Nobody can push me to love, not even me.

Why am I even taking advice from the biggest player on this damn planet? Maybe he isn't that bad after all.

"Oh I'm so sorry, I forgot you don't drink. I mean it I'm terribly sorry. I'll let them bring you something else. What do you want?" He apologizes.

"It's nothing really, water please."

Liam orders me some water and apologizes for another sixty times. I keep assuring it's okay, it's not that big of a deal. Forgetting is a sign of humanity.

Time seems to crawl further, slower than ever, almost standing still. Liam is trying his best to give me a good time but I can't really enjoy it, I feel sorry for Liam but somehow I don't let myself enjoy this, out of fear. I don't want to lose him as a friend but I don't want him to fall in love with me. This restaurant, his leaving yesterday and now the 'sure' I'm just scared to lose this wonderful guy. I could act like I'm in love with him just to have a boyfriend but that wouldn't be fair to him, and I'm sure as hell doing nothing like that.

"I'm happy to have you," he says out of nothing. Oh yay. "You mean as a friend?" I ask him. So rude. Damn madison that was rude.

"Well I want to tell you something." He says.

Oh no. No no no. No.

"I think I fell in love with you." He admits but I interrupt him. "No Liam I think that.." But now he interrupts me. "I wasn't finished yet." He says and smiles slightly. "I fell in love with you, I mean you're so wonderful, but I realize you don't feel the same for me. Your heart belongs to someone else. Maybe someone you didn't meet yet. I realize you feel nothing more than friendship but I'm so happy you came into my life so I want to stay friends, if you want me to. I won't try to persuade you and win your heart or something. I'm fine with this. I'm fine with being friends."

I smile a little. Relieved. But still a bad feeling towards Liam. I feel sorry for him.