Can You Keep A Secret?

Chapter Eighty-Four

-Andy's POV-

There was a particular ache that came alone with losing a friend, and it was one that filled me every time I looked at Mikey. If anything, the day out was supposed to reinforce how close we all were – After all, we had dropped everything to take Brooklyn out to try and cheer him up, and convinced Sophie to hide our little excursion from Blair.

We were now finishing up our desserts from dinner, which Brooklyn had selected the outside seats for – He was now deep in conversation with Rye, but when I listened in, I discovered it was actually a debate over what ice cream flavor names described them the best. Liv was leaning against Mikey as they shared a piece of chocolate cake. He balanced a chocolate chip on his tongue and she moved as if to try and lick it off before he swallowed, laughing. Jack had gone to the bathroom, and that left me alone – Everyone was paired off, and I was the odd man out.

The good news was, the plan that Liv had devised seemed to have worked – judging by the topic of conversation, Brooklyn was fully on the way to becoming his bubbly self again, if he wasn't already there. The bad news was that the entire event was a painstaking reminder of just how much I had lost. The words that both Liv and Mikey had said to me in their fits of anger rose back to the surface, even though I'd done my best to try and hide them away.

Each happy memory with Mikey that resurfaced felt like another stab wound – I didn't know whether or not we would have another one again. Life would've been so much easier if Liv had fallen for a complete stranger – At least that way, I could've vented to the boys about how I felt, and they would've helped me plan a big, elaborate scheme on how to win her heart, or at least on how to heal mine. Instead, I had to deal with it on my own. Hardly a single soul in the world knew my feelings for her other than myself, and yet it was still causing splashes in the tidepool. If Mikey was so suspicious of me now, would he ever even talk to me again if he ever found out?

Jack came running back, startling me as he snuck up behind Brooklyn, yelling "I love you Brook!" and causing more than one person from separate tables to look over at us. The whole day had been like that – Spoiling him with plenty of love and affection, just as he'd always loved but was rarely rewarded with. After his public display of affection, Jack slid into the seat on the other side of Brooklyn and easily joined their conversation, which had somehow shifted to what they would program their own assistant robots to do.

The feelings of being annoying and a nuisance cornered me in until I became convinced that I couldn't stay there any longer. I stood, saying that I was throwing away my trash for anyone that might've been listening, but nobody made any form of acknowledgement that I was leaving.

I didn't stop at the garbage can – instead opting to dawdle along boardwalk by myself. I glanced back, trying to gage whether or not my absence had been missed yet, but it seemed as if everyone was exactly where I had left them off. I walked just far enough so that I could still spot the restaurant, but not our table. I leaned against the railing, letting myself deflate like a popped balloon. In the public eye, I tied myself together with a smile to keep up the illusion of happiness, but now that I was alone again, I allowed myself to become undone.

I thought about my confrontation in the alleyway the other night – I had stood there, heart racing and palms sweating as I'd waited for a gangster to come out of the shadows, certain that it would be the night that I sacrificed it all for love. But in the end, it hadn't been a scowling menace at all – It had been Chad.

Confused, I had asked, in a low whisper, as if I expected the real person waiting for me to jump out at any second, "What are you doing here?"

He had flashed me the same million-dollar smile that he'd shown to guests at his party as he replied, "I'm here to pick up the cargo you so graciously delivered to me."

Incredulous, I had asked, "You bought drugs?"

He looked confused for a second before saying, "Is that what he told you you were doing?"

"Well, not exactly, but..."

"Well, it's not, by the way Just some computer equipment. And maybe a little bit of cocaine. But that's just for entertainment. I could show you if you helped me unload it..." Shocked, I had stood there like a deer in the headlights.

"You don't have to," I had said, trying to wrap my mind around the turn of events. "But, wait. Why are you paying so much money for it, then?"

"Josh told me about your predicament with Liv, and I wanted to help you. After all, £4k is barely anything to me now."

"But why? Even after I broke your mirror? And why did I have to come all of this way thinking I was doing a drug deal?" I speculated.

"Mate, I told you that I don't care about the mirror. And it proved how much you were willing to risk for it, since you still have your band and all. Besides, I really did need that equipment delivered." He'd shrugged.

Right before I had left, once we'd finished unloading, he'd rested his hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eyes. "Good luck on winning Liv over. Tell me how it goes. And you're always welcome at my place."

None of the boys knew that this had happened, or that I had £9k waiting to give to Liv, but I didn't know how. I rested my head in my arms, closing my eyes. Maybe I should keep my promise to Rye on the getting help thing – I was no longer sure that I could handle it all.