Can You Keep A Secret?

Chapter Ninety

-Andy's POV-

Mikey and I hadn't sorted anything out, not really. We'd had the terse conversation of two arguing kids forced to talk it out in a school's counseling room.

The conversation had gone along the lines of Mikey saying, in a hushed, fervent tone, so as not to upset Liv any further, "Why the fuck did you kiss her?" There were so many obvious answers that I could've gone for – It was a mistake, I didn't mean anything by it, I'm madly in love with her wand wish that she could see that she belongs with me instead. (Ha! As if.)

Instead, without thinking clearly, I'd blurted out, "I've kissed you before and it wasn't a big deal."

It clearly took him by surprise for a second, but once he'd gotten over the shock of it, he'd said, "Yeah, well, Liv's a girl and you're straight."

"Am I?" I'd shot back, causing Rye to raise his eyebrows incredulously.

"I mean...aren't you?" He had asked, quite confused by now. I'd let out a big sigh, deciding to pull out the hurtful truth instead.

"Yeah, but that's beside the point. I mean, we've been best friends out whole lives. Don't you think she would've known if she liked me like that by now? She's in love with you, and that's so fucking clear in everything that she does."

"It's not Liv that I'm worried about," He'd said, looking over at her as she conversed with the others. "It's how you feel."

"When has that ever mattered? You think everything I do is for attention anyways."

"Andy, I-" He'd started, but I hadn't stuck around to listen. I knew how he felt about me, and there was no hiding it. We might be forced to live together, but we weren't friends.

I'd crouched on my bed, knees pulled tight to my chest, and watched Liv – the one person that I'd actually wanted to talk to – leave. I'd taken advantage of the time that Rye was gone to go out and buy enough alcohol to be proper pissed for the rest of the day. I'd stood outside of the shop, on my way to getting buzzed already, with the day hardly even started yet.

Today was shaping up to be equally as miserable – I'd pleaded ill as they all set out for the studio, and Mikey had obviously been on the side for me to stay back. Rye had made me triple promise not to do anything while they were gone, and I was nursing such a terrible hangover that I'd actually been able to keep them.

My headache had soothed enough for me to keep my eyes open without the sunlight being terribly bothersome, so I'd taken the piece of glass back out and was twisting it back and forth, watching the way that the light bounced off of it. I was considering getting a glass of water to make a rainbow when I heard the door being opened.

"Hello?" I called out, checking my phone for the text from Rye signaling that they were coming back like he had promised, but there was nothing. "Who is it?" I asked, mildly concerned that it was Mikey coming back to beat me up.

"It's just me." I twisted around in bed to see Liv. She looked pale and sad, and I had to fight against my natural instincts to go over and hug her. "I'm just here to get the rest of my stuff," she explained, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear as she began to pack. I nodded, even though she couldn't see.

"Are you going back home? To Liverpool?" I asked, avoiding what I really wanted to say – Are you leaving because of me? I patted the piece of glass, which I had slipped into my pocket. This time, it was Liv's turn to nod.

She turned and looked at me for a fraction of a second to say "I'm sorry," and then it was back to silence. I found myself choking up, unsure of what to say. Instead, I watched as she gracefully found her things and tossed them into her bag – tossed her out of our lives – just like that. At some point, she broke out into a fit of hiccups. She sat down on the bed opposite of me then, shaking her head.

"I never use to get them-" hic – "But now-" hic – "I've been getting them every single-" hic – "day."

"Would you like some water?" I asked, but she declined, opting to hold her breath instead. I looked around the room, noting how devoid it was of any traces of her already. I missed her, even though she was sitting right in front of me. I chanced another peek at her, just to note how poorly she really looked.

"Liv? Are you sure you're okay?" I asked, and she nodded, only to shake her head a few second later and dart off to the bathroom. A couple of days ago I guessed that it was just a stomach bug, but now I didn't know.

I stood a couple of feet outside of the bathroom, hesitantly calling out, "Liv?" When she didn't reply, I walked all of the way in. She might not like me very much right now, but I had to make sure she was alright. She clung to the toilet, coughing up...blood.

All other thoughts and hesitations left me. I crouched beside her, gently removing her hair from her face as she heaved. Since we'd grown up together, this wasn't the first time I'd seen her get sick, but this was certainly the scariest.

"I'm gonna get you to help, okay?" I whispered, hating to see her so weak and in so much pain. When she was ready, I picked her up and she collapsed into me. As a quick second thought, I reached over and grabbed my phone, and then I was off, going as fast as I could with still making sure she was alright.

"It's okay, it's okay," I said as she trembled and gripped my shirt within her first. "I'm here. I'm here, and I've got you."