Can You Keep A Secret?

Chapter Seventy-Two

-Andy's POV-

Even though Liv had clung to Mikey like plastic wrap all day, she had fallen against me on the ride back home, soft snores escaping her lips. The car smelled like the McDonalds we'd stopped to get and victory – We had all made it through the long day and conquered our various demons.

Rye had opened up about what he'd gone through to the world, Liv had fought through her fear, and me? I'd probably gone through the entire emotion spectrum in one day. I mindlessly stroked Liv's hand with my thumb, watching what little of the road that I could make out in the darkness pass by. I felt a sort of peace inside – Any thoughts of death were temporarily squelched by a celebration of life. I had a feeling that everyone had taken something different from the concert, seeking and finding whatever it was that they had been missing.

I had gotten the message that the human spirit can endure, and that it's important that we treasure this precious life while we still had it. I was unsure of how long this new belief would last, but I planned to embrace it while it still lingered.

I gently moved over to take a look at Liv, only to feel her hand taken away from me – captured by Mikey. My heart squeezed, feeling as if he had taken ahold of that instead of Liv. Of course things couldn't be perfect, not even in a moment like this – What next, would he push her so that she was leaning on him instead?

"What was that for?" I whispered. He shrugged, clearly not giving a damn now that he had reclaimed what was "his." Well, Liv was her own person. She didn't belong to anyone, and I was her best friend – I had just as much of a right to have a connection with her as he did. Still, the time on the dash proclaimed that it was 1:27AM, and I was simply too tired to try and argue with him now, so I let the matter go.

"Uhm, will we be stopping for a bathroom break soon?" I asked, suddenly antsy to get out of the car and vaguely recalling a sign for a petrol station a little while back.

"You're in luck," Blair said, turning the blinker on.

I gazed around the car, checking the others – I could hardly see Rye in the front seat. Jack was silent but awake, the glow of his phone screen turning his face a bright white, and Brooklyn was fast asleep on the other side of him, head resting on his seat belt. And then, of course, there was me, Liv, and Mikey, three in a row. A love triangle to envy Twilight, I thought bitterly.

Once we stopped off at the station, Blair got out to fill the car's tank, and Mikey trailed behind me into the little shop connected to it. Memories of the ride back from Chad's echoed in my mind.

"So, what's your problem?" Mikey asked as soon as we were out of hearing distance from the others.

"What do you mean, what's my problem?" I rebutted, rubbing my eyes to help them adjust to the light.

"You know what I mean..." His voice trailed off for a minute as he considered the fact that maybe I didn't. "The, the, you know. And you've been alone with Liv a lot lately," he said, his voice gaining strength.

"If by a lot you mean once, then, yeah," I snorted. "But I'm her friend. Is that suddenly not allowed? Are you the only one she's allowed to spend time with?"

"No," he said, on the defense now. "And are you forgetting that you spent half of the break at her house doing who-knows-what, only to disappear and leave her frenzied looking for you?"

"No, I'm well aware of that, thank you," I said, hot bile trying to force its way up my throat. "What, do you think we were playing around? Who do you take me for?" I tried to remain steady, to keep a grasp on all of the good things that I'd been feeling earlier, but they were quickly dissolving until, like salt in water, I couldn't even see them anymore.

"I don't even know anymore," he said, throwing his hands into the air. My chest began heaving as I tried to decide whether to cry, run out of there, or punch him. My mind scattered between the options like a high speed casino game, but no matter how many times I put a pound in and pulled the lever, I couldn't get three of the same to line up, couldn't get a jackpot.

Finally, I decided on a neutral, saying "Why are you even here? Do you even have to go to the bathroom?" I spat the words out like they were food that was too hot and was burning my mouth.

"No, I'm good here," He said, turning to walk out. He paused right before going out the door. "On second thought, here's one last thing – Stay away from Liv. She loves me, not you." And then he was gone.

This time, I was the opposite of fire. I was a soggy piece of paper, thin and able to break and fall apart with just the slightest of touches – But Mikey hadn't been careful with his words. He had shredded me up more than my broken letter that I'd tossed into the trash, full of the words that I'd never say to Liv.

I made a split-second decision, grabbing a bottle of both vodka and water and purchasing them before entering the bathroom. I poured the water down the sink, wishing that I could toss my feelings down the drain with it, as well. I took a hearty swig of the alcohol to rid some of it before carefully pouring the rest into the empty water bottle – Perfect.

I enjoyed the crashing sound that the now-empty vodka bottle made as I tossed it into the trash. I then relieved myself, the only thing I'd been planning to do in the first place, before washing my hands and exiting. I nearly ran into Brooklyn on the way out, who grinned and said that Rye had woken him up just to make sure that he took advantage of the bathroom break.

I tried to mask my emotions as I wished him the best of luck and he laughed. It was becoming clear to me that the only way to avoid having your feelings fucked over was to not have any at all.