Can You Keep A Secret?

Chapter Thirty

-Andy's POV-

For every bad thought, I took a shot.

My life is so out of control right now, and I've managed to drag everyone else down with me. Take a shot. I didn't dive in to save Rye like he did for me. I didn't even fucking know that he was drowning. Take a shot. I left home almost as soon as I arrived, dodging my mum's questions and going to this shitty bar instead. Take a shot. Rye should've just left me to die. Take fuckin' twenty shots.

The small cups were spread around the counter in front of me, in various degrees of disorder – Some were upright, some were still waiting to enter my bloodstream, some laid on their side, one of which still had vodka in it, and the alcohol fanned out into a sticky mess. Guess I just created chaos wherever I went. Take a shot. Rye could've died. Liv could've died. Why wasn't anyone punishing me? Shot. Shot. Shot. Two types of shots, and both could kill you.

I drank until my head was buzzed, and I looked down to see that my hands were shaking, but I couldn't even feel them. A girl came over – blonde hair, blue eyes like crystals, cleavage out for the world to see. She took my hand, bit her lips before leaning over to bite mine. I didn't fight back as she kissed me, her tongue exploring my mouth, her hand on my dick, putting mine on her breast. My sight flickered between her smile, the lights, my vodka glasses. I let out an involuntary moan, and she pulled her towards her, off the stool, and the world spun like some crazy carousel.

She whispered something in my ear about a hotel, and if I closed my eyes, I could almost imagine that this was the girl I really wanted, and I could feel her teeth making love bites on my neck, when the music playing filtered through to me – "I'm not broke, I'm just a brokenhearted man...How can I move on when I'm still in love with you?" And I pushed her away before I fucked up again.

She pouted, a lioness on the prowl, but she wouldn't be faltered by a guy too drunk to enjoy it anyways. There were plenty of me in the bar who would be willing to give her a handjob in one of the grimy bathrooms, but me? I had to get to Liv. I had to get to Liv, I had to tell her the truth, I had to make things right. Liverpool wasn't too far away from here, and if I started now, I would be there in less than an hour.

I stumbled out of the bar, clinging onto the doorframe for support before launching myself into the cold night air. I sucked it in, taking my phone out. The numbers and letters were blurry, and I accidentally called a few other people before, by chance, landing on Liv's number. I plopped myself on the ground while it rangrangrang.

I remembered the last time my phone was ringringringing, she didn't pick up, the ground was damp, I was wet, it was raining. Oh, oh, wow, water was falling from the sky. Whoa. I opened my mouth to let some in. She picked up on the third ring the second time I called.

"Andy? It's 1am. Where are you?"

I said what I thought was "I'm coming to you, we need to talk," but my words were slurred.

"You're drunk. Don't go anywhere. Tell me where you are and I'll come to you."

"No, no, don't," I said, already trying to get up. I fell a little, reached my arm out to steady myself, and slowly stood up.

"Andy? I'm not kidding. You can't really be thinking of driving anywhere. Are you?" Her voice was serious, stressed. My finger slipped, or maybe it was on purpose, but I hung up, made my way over to the car. She was simply overthinking it, I would be able to drive just fine. She was, like, half an hour away. Nothing would happen. I would be fine. It took me seven tries to get the keys in. It took me a couple more tries to get to the entrance, but I got there – It was just a small slipup, is all.

Out on the road, the lines kept moving, making it hard for me to stay in the right lane. Why were they doing that?! Was the road trying to make me slip up to prove Liv right? But, no. I was fine, it was fine, I was invincible! I could RULE the WORLD! I could drive a damn car!

It seemed to be going smoothly, the lines stayed in place, until a deer jumped out in front of the car – Not even taking the time to think, I swerved to the left, and that's when time slowed down – The world turned upside down, and this time, it wasn't because I was drunk. I closed my eyes because the whole scene was disorienting, nauseating. The sound of metal crunching, of breaking glass, couldn't be blocked out, though.

It sounded like the world was ending, but eventually everything went still – I opened my eyes. I was still alive. I was alive. Looking around immediately sobered me – The door beside me had been ripped completely off. The roof was dented so that it rested a mere centimeter or two above my head. The front window shield was shattered completely, and yet somehow, but some miracle, I was still alive. Maybe a little cut up by the glass, but otherwise unharmed.

I reached up to touch my face, and when I pulled my hand back down, there was blood on it. Maybe it was more of a curse than a blessing, because now I was stuck here, and I was hit with a sudden, paralyzing wave of panic. I managed to work through it and get out of the car, but not before my drinks came back up and I was sick all over myself – Great. What an ideal situation to be in.

I looked and smelled horrible, my car had crashed off the side of the road – The barrier itself was smashed in. It was early morning, dark out, my phone was completely ruined, sitting in smithereens somewhere in the car. I was completely stranded, with no way to call anyone, not to mention that the rain was coming down harder now, soaking me to the bone.

I had no idea how long I'd been driving, or how far away the nearest shop was. But...surely it could only get better from here, right?