A Weekend Away // l.s.

Volume i - Chapter 13

Louis' POV

I broke up with Gemma.

I just couldn't do it anymore. Not to Gemma and not to Harry. All the lying and sneaking and trying to make both of them feel what I felt for them, was just too hard.

And Harry's the only one that I really want.

So I asked myself, why am I still with Gemma, if I'm falling for her brother?

I couldn't answer it, so I broke things off with her.

I turned around from my position cooking sausages with Zayn, to see Harry holding Gemma as she tried to hold back tears. He looked so concerned for her. There was so much love between those siblings, and I was tearing it apart. I had been turning them against each other by, well, leading them on.

That's what it was and today I finally realised it.

I had been leading Gemma on by staying with her even though I like Harry, and I had been leading Harry on by being with Gemma but also telling him how I really feel.

I hate myself for it. I never pictured myself to be one of those guys, one those popular boys in school who had a different relationship every week and didn't care who they hurt. They only cared about what they wanted and how to get it, but that was exactly who I'd become.

Someone who would keep two people around while they tried to decide who was the better choice. How ridiculous is that? Not to mention cruel...

But now Harry and I can be together, because I let Gemma go. I'm sure she'll be happy and find someone some day.

I kept watching them, seeing what would happen. Harry rubbed Gemma's back and spoke into her ear. Then, she looked up and said something that made his eyes go wide. He hugged her to his chest as she calmed down and looked up at me.

Oh shit, he's looking!

I thought about looking away, but I couldn't. His eyes held me there with something that I couldn't quite place. He was surprised, sure, but he looked completely heartbroken with a hint of burning anger as well. It was really confusing and I found myself desperately yearning to know what Gemma had said.

He tilted his head to the side and furrowed his eye brows, silently asking me something, though I wasn't sure what. Maybe he's asking me if what she had said was true? But I didn't know what she said.

I just looked at him with a light smile and did the same thing, soundlessly asking him what he was saying.

He shook his head and looked back down at Gemma who was wiping her eyes and sitting up. She turned to Liam who hugged her and then lightly kissed her forehead. Her eyes lit up and she gave him a huge smile before taking his hand and leading him away from Harry and Niall to cuddle on the other side of the fire.

I should be angry, like, who kisses and cuddles someone right in front of their ex who they were still with as of an hour ago? But I found myself feeling fine. I want her to be happy, the same way that I hope she'll want me to be happy when she finds out about me and Harry.

If Liam is what makes her happy, then that's fine by me.

I looked back to where Harry and Niall were sitting. They were leaning in close with their heads down, speaking under their breath about something that seemed to be terribly important.

Then, Harry looked up at me, the same weird expression on his face as before and it hit me.

Betrayal.

It was written all over his face, though I couldn't fathom why.

My smile was gone and instead I stood, slack jawed and staring at him as he looked back at me with disgust.

Disgust? What had I done wrong?

He stood, leant down to whisper something to Niall before walking over to me, looking me dead in the eye.

If looks could kill...

I was frozen as I stared back, wondering what on earth had happened between him and Gemma just now.

"What are you playing at, hm?" he said once he had reached me "First me, now my sister. How many people do you need to break? Is this your thing, or something? Do you enjoy hurting people?"

He shoved my chest making me stagger back a few paces.

"Harry, I, wha-" I had no idea what to say. I think Gemma must have told him that we broke up, but I can't imagine why that would have made him this upset.

"Hey, hey now." Zayn interrupted, turning away from the stove "Don't fight, not here."

"He's a slut and a whore and just... JUST... GAH! He hurts everyone he can and doesn't even care. He's so full of bullshit and fucked in the head that he deserves to fuck off and never have anyone fall for him again because they only get hurt! Just look at Gem. Look what he's done to her!"

Harry lunged at me, only to be stopped just centimetres short by Niall, grabbing him from behind.

"Don't Harry, drop it. Please, just leave it." He hissed.

Harry ignored his warning and threw himself at me again, reaching out for my shirt. I stumbled back and tripped on a tree root, falling to the ground. Harry wrestled out of Niall's grasp and advanced on me. I scrambled backward until I hit a tree, but Harry was still coming for me.

"Look at what he's done to me! Is this how I am now? Resorting to violence every time I look at him? I was never this kind of person but now? Well, it looks like this jerk has succeeded in completely destroying yet another human being in his never ending quest to fuck things up!"

My eyes were full of fear as he approached but thankfully, he was stopped by Niall again just in time.

He tried to wrench free but Niall had a strong hold.

"HARRY!" he exclaimed.

"You better watch yourself, Tomlinson." He spat at me, causing me to flinch against the tree, before he stormed back to the chair, Niall following, trying to calm him down.

I don't think I have ever been so terrified in my entire life.

I sat against the tree, trying to wrap my head around what just happened. I thought breaking up with Gemma would fix all these problems between Harry and I.

I thought he would be overjoyed to know that we could finally be together. That our relationship would no longer be just simple "I like you"'s and pecks on the cheek. That I could kiss him and hold him and tell him how I feel every single day. That I could fall in love with him and have him fall in love with me. That we could be together, happily.

I never thought he would be this protective of Gemma. That he would take her feelings to heart. That he would actually believe the hurtful things he said to me. That he thinks I want to hurt him. I would never...

But it seems I've only succeeded in causing more problems.

All I was thinking about was me, I never thought about it from Gemma's perspective and now I've just ruined everything.

Well, it seems like Harry was right about one thing. I'm a fuck up and truly never deserve to find love.

Not that I want to if it's not with Harry.