dizzy - thoughts & stuff

IT'S FUCKING HALLOWEEN BITCHES

GUESS WHAT FUCKING TIME IT IS

TIME TO GET S P O O P Y

HALLOWEEN IS MY FUCKING FAVORITE IDC

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT I WILL SHOVE A PUMPKIN SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOU'LL TASTE IT

HALLOWEEN IS SO GREAT

GETTING TO DRESS UP

AND GETTING FREE CANDY

AND GIVING CANDY TO LITTLE KIDS

AND SEEING OTHER PEOPLE'S COSTUMES

AND WATCHING NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS UNTIL JANUARY

I'M SO FUCKING R E A D Y

I WAIT ALL YEAR EVERY YEAR EVER SINCE I CAME OUT THE FUCKING WOMB FOR THIS SHIT TO COME

I LOVE IT SO MUCH

FUCK YEAH HALLOWEEN

AHHHHHHH

okayokay i've gotten it out of my system for today i'm sorry i'm just hella halloween i'm so excite

this week has been either really bad or really good no in between idk but at first it was a really shit week but at least it ended on a high note

everything was just ok, thursday was good bc we had the homecoming game and i went with some friends and that was fun, but nothing extraordinary until friday and then shit got bad bc i'm clingy and terrible and not at all in control of my emotions but

i got really fucking sad and i couldn't stop tearing up and it was really hard to not cry and i just had to sit at lunch and continuously tell all my friends that no i was fine just tired but g o d i was terrible like my chest actually hurt i went straight home and didn't let the dogs out didn't eat didn't even change out of my uncomfortable clothes i just covered myself completely in my comforter and curled up and sobbed for a bit and then went to sleep for a long time

i hate getting attached to people it actually sucks so don't do that or you'll end up like me okay kids

but then saturday was good, that was the homecoming dance and for like 30 minutes before i left the house to go meet my friends for dinner i couldn't stop crying bc my dad bought me a corsage and showed it to me and i automatically went "i'm not wearing that" because i'm an ungrateful piece of shit :))) but that set me off bc i'd hurt his feelings and then i couldn't stop bc i got v overwhelmed and all that kind of stuff with the dresses and going out is very not my thing and it just all of a sudden hit me that like "oh shit i have to go do this"

but i got my shit together and we went to dinner and i got a quesadilla and this one binch named christopher literally came to have dinner with us but wasn't even going to the dance, and we're all dressed up in fancy dresses and heels (not me i wore my converse y33t) and the other guy had like a dress shirt and pants with a tie u know but then this bitch shows up in a fuckin cowboy hat

i wish i was joking and i also wish i had pictures

it got a lil awkward bc another group showed up and one of the people in it was this cute guy from my vet class but apparently they all h a t e my one friend that we were with so that was weird. and i had to go to the bathroom but to get there we had to walk directly past them and my friend decides to stop to say hi so i had to awkwardly stand there bc i barely even know them and just :)))

at first the dance wasn't good bc there was barely anyone there and i didn't like any of the music they were playing and for a long time i just couldn't make myself dance, like idk how to dance and it's just not my thing so i just awkwardly stood there like the fun sponge i am until allll the way at the end i managed to loosen up and start dancing, and then ofc i end up right next to cute boy from vet bc the universe hates me but i kept dancing bc i was having fun w my friends and in the end that's more important than some boi so ye.