dizzy - thoughts & stuff

🚨 emo alert 🚨

(guys this ^^ is the most me thing ive ever read tbh)

this is gonna be depressing at least for the most part so yeah if you dont wanna read that then don't

i just. don't understand why i have to be so sad and empty all the time

like sometimes im fine and happy but most of the time its just like nothing or sad

and its for no reason. like there's plenty of reasons i could be sad, but none of them are actually why

my parents and sister are having a family movie night and didn't even bother to invite me

my boyfriend is over a thousand miles away and probably hates me anyways

im fat and ugly

im not going anywhere in life

i lack the motivation to do much of anything

i don't have any real friends

im s o lonely, all the fucking time

im overall just pathetic, but still none of those are the reasons why im sad

and i just wanna cry or go to sleep but idk if i can even cry rn and i can't sleep so

i have a final, the first part of which is due tomorrow, that i've barely even started let alone looked at

i have another one wednesday im definitely gonna fail

and the rest the week after, which i obviously don't want to take. and im also probably not going to do great on

and i just don't understand why i have to be like this

i hate it

i hate myself

i just wanna disappear

pics of my guinea pig playing outside to make up for the sad

also moved the ducks outside

i got my laptop all fixed up and a charger for it so i could now write if i wanted to, if i wrote fics would anyone be interested in reading them?

also should i go wash my hair or not i cant decide

love you

-
song recommendation: too late to say goodbye by cage the elephant