Baby's Father

Rodger, are you okay?

"Uhn, uhn boy I love you and all but you need to get up off my couch. When the last time you took a bath?" My grandma hit me with the newspaper making me sit up. "Man this couch gone be okay." I groaned rubbing my eyes.

"I ain't ya man and not trying to be. Look at you boy, you look like shit." I shook my head rubbing my hand through my waves. "You telling me this everyday ain't gone do nothing grandma. You know I ain't got no real place to go, I came over here for peace." I stressed getting tired of the insults.

"Okay, I'm sorry baby I really am. I just want you to fix things with Camila, your baby is almost due. Ari misses you I know that much, have you talk to her?" "Yes grandma, the only time Camila respond to my text is when I'm asking about my kids. Me and Ari talk everyday, Camila don't even wanna get on the phone with me." I shook my head putting my arms up. "Owee chileee, I'm trying to be here for ya but those armpits about to knock me down baby." She put my arms down making me smack my lips laughing.

"But just give her some time to understand what she wants baby. That woman loves you, you just have to show her back. You know you messed up son so just suck it up and kiss some ass." I looked over at her and all she did was shrug.

She was right. I was still communicating with Niah, that was her name. But it was for a good reason, I wanted to make sure I went out with a bang. She was my key to that and how I seen it was Camila was going to have to get over it. But it was much deeper than that for her and although a nigga understood why, all I was seeing is dollar signs and not her feelings. I hadn't been outside since cause my face was fucked up from Camila throwing them punches on me.

I got up grabbing my duffle bag to take me a shower.

I just wanted her in my arms again, I wanted to hear her laugh again, I missed her begging for food every hour. I missed how she rubbed my back as I fell asleep, missed waking up to her, morning breath and all. I chuckled cause for the longest she use to wake up earlier than me and brush her teeth then hop in bed. Like a nigga couldn't put two and two together. The way she touched me was like no other female I been with. The way she seduced and still played hard to get had me sprung on it.

I turned the shower head over waiting on the water to heat up. I just wanted my family back.

••••
"Oooow, that's the grandson I remember." My grandma geeked my head up making me laugh. I had on a nice, long sleeve silk shirt. Some regular black jeans cut at the knees.

"Thank you, you know I gotta try." I checked myself out in the mirror. "Where you going?" "To get my girl back." She laughed clapping her hands.

I grabbed my keys and wallet leaving her house. It's been too long without her and I learned my lesson so I'm ready to make it work. I didn't want nothing coming in between us especially no money.

She was due this month and I needed to be there for her more than ever. Ain't no way I was letting her take care of my responsibilities on her own again. I pulled out the driveway going straight to the flower shop.

She liked roses so I was going to get her a dozen of those, a cake, and some wings. If that wasn't a start then I didn't know what was. She enjoyed the simple romantic shit so that's what I was bringing her.

A few minutes of traffic I was at K's Flowe Shop getting out the car. Everybody was walking around in jackets and shit but this was my type of weather. Cool but not too cool, just enough to bring out the long sleeves.

"Hi, welcome to K's Flower Shop, can I help you with anything special this evening?" A cute blonde walked up to the desk smiling instantly making me wish she closed it. She took like she been chewing on rocks. "Yes actually, I want to get my fiancé a dozen Red Roses." I pulled out my card ready to swipe. "Okay, that's gonna be $150.00 sir." I ran my card through putting it back in my wallet.

"She's gonna love these, we always sell these so we keep them ready in the back." She walked up with the Roses wrapped in clear paper with a big pink bow on it. "Thank you." I took it from her walking out.

Throughout the weeks all I had on my mind was the fight we had. She got crazy on me but not that crazy to destroy my shit other than my phone. I got that shit back the next day but my clothes was a different story. Seeing that look in her eye always told me to back off and let her be crazy on her own. She black my eye and left me with a swole jaw after shit was said and done. But no matter what Id never put my hands on her.

Her dad already informed me that when she gets mad she flash out and don't think. She had that problem bad enough where she ran her ex nigga over after catching him in the bed with another girl. That's why I try to be careful with her cause I knew what went on that she didn't tell me. That was a dark spot for her but I still remain solid and stay. I loved that girl with all my heart no matter what happened.

I pulled up to Wingstop drive thru looking on the menu cause I was a little hungry too. She always wanted lemon pepper, parmesan, and dry buffalo wings with a large Strawberry Lemonade.

••••

I pulled up to the house feeling butterflies go off for the first time in a long time making me feel funny. I was Rodger, and Rodger ain't get nervous not even for the police. I got out the car grabbing her roses, the food, and the vanilla buttercream cake.

I walked up to the doorstep fixing my shirt making sure I looked like a meal. I knocked on the door and rung the doorbell and already it felt like a fucking life time went by. I sat there looking down at everything I got her hoping this was enough for a start.

My paranoia got the best of me looking through the window tryna see anything cause she was taking too long for me.

"Who is it?!" I hurried up and got back infront of the door. "It's me!" The door didn't open immediately but a long pause before she opened the door.

There she was, in short silk robe with her hair tied up.

"What is it?" She looked away and down still holding the door. "Can I come in?" I held up all the things I had in my hand tryna make it even more obvious. She swung the door open turning around, "look Rodger Ari's not here she's with my mama until later tonight." I was hearing her but that ass and hips was hypnotizing a nigga slowly. "Can I talk about us then? I got these for you." She turned around looking at everything in my arm.

"Thank you but Rodger what about us? We left that shit alone last month and I ain't got time for no sold dreams." She took the roses out of my hand admiring them before sitting them on the counter. "I'm here because I miss you and I love you girl, I just wanna be home with my family. I'm tired of the only time I get to see Ari is through a phone screen." She sat there quietly for a while with an unreadable expression.

"And I want to be there for my son." She scoffed laughing making me look sideways. "You want to be here for your son but you put yourself in the position where I don't even want you in the water touching me during the birth. I can't even look at you right now without picturing you with that bitch in my head." She sat down holding her stomach closing her eyes tight.

"Baby you okay?" I rushed over to her but she pushed my hands away. "I'm fine, we are just fine. It's getting closer to that time so he is flipping." I backed up feeling so bad and fucked up, it felt like I failed her before the baby even got here.

"Rodger I can't be with you right now and it's for the best. You holding onto New York is gonna cost you and I been telling you that since that bitch put a baby on you. You can't let them fucking streets go for me so I gotta let you go." She sniffed looking up at me.

"Nah you can't say that, not after all the shit we been through. Look I know what I did was sneaky but I came to terms with your feelings and did the best move I could and let that shit go. As long as I have my family I know I'm be good, Camila I need you." I grabbed her hand not letting go.

Tears ran from her eyes and I could tell this was hard for her but it was for me too. "You gotta go." She mumbled resting her head on my chest almost making me cry and I never did that shit.

Our hands slowly split apart breaking my heart because it felt so real. This couldn't be the end to us.

Lord, this just gave me the blues and broke my heart. Camila standing strong seems like, from the looks of it Rodger's not giving up or accepting the fact that it's over as far as Camila says.

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